Bob had persisted. “And you’re involved with our grandkids, and you still tutor children over at Caster Elementary School. You find time to bake for everyone around here. How many people and their problems must you take on before it gets to be too darn much for you? I don’t want to see you collapse.”

Bob had offered a fair appraisal of her life. She was going in too many directions. Some days, she started out in the morning and didn’t remember where she was going. This wasn’t dementia, she realized, just juggling too many plates in the air. How had she dug herself in so deeply with so many people, all at the same time?

“I know you’re right. What’s drives me so, do you think?” she’d asked.

Bob had rubbed his chin and gotten that look on his face that indicated that he had something on his mind but would rather not say what it was.

“Tell me. I need you to be honest with me, Bob.”

“I think you’re running scared.”

“Running scared of what?”

“Maybe you’re just plain scared of dying.” He put his arm about her shoulder. “Sometimes we’re all just plain scared of dying.”

“Everyone dies,” she replied, but avoided looking at him.

Bob leaned across their chairs to kiss her cheek. “Of course we do. Some of us are more what I’d call people oriented than others. Some people like doing things for others, helping others. That’s you, my love. Maybe you feel time is running out and you’re trying to do as much as you can for the people you care about.”

“You think that’s it?”

“Well, I don’t really know, but maybe, maybe it could be. There are some of us who think we ought to get on the stick and do something for someone else before our time runs out, and some of us, like me for instance, don’t feel that’s what their lives are about.”

“What is your life about—I mean, when you really search your soul, Bob?”

“Loving the people I love, not knowingly harming anyone,” he replied. “I feel an obligation to myself, to you, to my grandkids and my son to take care of myself, to stay in good health. It seems to me that at this time of our lives, we spend a certain percentage of time on what I call maintenance, going to doctors, having our teeth and eyes taken care of, working out, staying healthy. That’s an obligation. Staying well, so we’ll be there for those we love.”