“Is that so?” Lauren’s face warmed, and he tightened his arm around her.

“Do you think about that?” he asked.

“Of course I do.”

“Is it okay that we haven’t? Yet? I just want our first time to be perfect, and I’m terrified I’ll have a repeat of the night before we kissed. And I’m so tired all the time, which pisses me off. But also, I’m a little worried that it would, um…expose you. To the chemo, somehow. Is that possible?”

Lauren propped her chin on his chest. His left arm was folded behind his head, and he looked down at her with questioning eyes.

“It’s possible, yes. I never got to this part in your chemo education,” she pinched him in the ribs, and he flinched and laughed, “but I usually make sure men know to wear condoms. To protect their partner.”

Andrew nodded, his smile fading. “Even that wouldn’t protect you one hundred percent, though. I’d rather wait until I’m done and it’s completely safe, if that’s okay with you. I mean, to be clear, I don’t want to wait, but I think we should wait. You know?”

Lauren shifted higher on his chest and planted a sweet kiss on his lips. “I do know.” She pushed herself to a sitting position beside him, folding her legs together. “Actually, I’d kind of thought the next guy I slept with would be my husband.”

Andrew’s eyes met hers, and he tilted his head to the side, waiting for her to continue.

“Um, Will was…my first, and when I realized it meant nothing to him, I was devastated. After that I thought maybe I’d wait until I was married, because then I’d know I wasn’t being used, and that the man I was with wanted me for more than my body.” She shrugged and added, “Or my chemistry skills.”

Andrew shot up to a sitting position. “Are you fucking kidding me?” His jaw went taut, and he swung his legs off the edge of the bed, his back to her. “I’m going to kill that son-of-a—”

“Andrew,” Lauren put a gentle hand on his back, where the muscles were bunched and tense. “Don’t worry about that; I was just trying to explain why I’m waiting now.”

“Don’t worry about it?” he bit out. He stood, flexing his fingers. “I’m so pissed I can’t see straight.”

Lauren scrambled to the edge of the bed and got up on her knees. She grabbed his hand and pulled him close to her, turning his body to face her. His face was like stone.

“Look at me,” she said, and he did. “Don’t let that bother you. I’m over it, okay? I learned something from it. And now I have you, and you’re better than anything I could have ever imagined.”