"As you can see, we're excited to have you here." Seth stands next to the TV. "And we're committed to helping you take the next step in your career."

The lights dim and I dig my fingers into the chair. Oh no. I know what's coming. My mouth feels dry and I do my best to resist the urge to dive under the table. A Josh Grobin song plays as images of me on Family Affair flash across the screen.

"Even as a small child, Kaitlin Burke was destined for stardom." A voiceover that sounds like Seth narrates.

They highlight some of Sam's biggest moments -- her first kiss, her first horseback riding championship, fights with Sara, the heroic moment when she saved her mom during the Buchanan Manor fire -- and include this famous FA scene. I'm five and Sam is in the hospital because of one of the many bizarre illnesses she's developed over the years. Paige and Dennis are crying over my limp body and I sit up and say, "Stop crying! I'm not dying, you know." Tom thought I was so funny, he left the line in.

"As the years passed, Kaitlin's star shined brighter and the film world beckoned." Roles like Off-Key are shown and there's even footage from PYA.

"The public's appetite for everything Kaitlin is insatiable," Seth adds as several of my magazine covers, my Fever endorsement, Nickelodeon awards, TV appearances, and red carpet moments flash on the screen. "The question is, what is Kaitlin's next move?" The screen goes black. "The answer? Anything she wants." Images of Barbie dolls, Oscar winners, the VMAs, and other Hollywood commodities zoom by. "The choice is up to you, Kaitlin, and Creative Connections is ready to help you make it." Everyone applauds. When the lights come up I see that Mom and Dad are teary.

This. Is. So. Embarrassing.

"The film, TV, music, reality, and theater divisions are all here and they have a lot of exciting offers to go over with you," Seth continues. "It's time to leave the wholesome goodness of Sam behind and take on a new character and a new career path that will distinguish you from your work on Family Affair."

Why does everyone keep reminding me that I'm no longer playing Sam? For years all anyone would say was how lucky I was to play such a goodie-goodie who is adored by the public and the press. Now everyone wants to throw her under the bus.

The film division is first. There's a bizarre action flick shooting in Mexico that is based on a true story. I would play a missionary's daughter who single-handedly saves a whole village from extinction. It sounds intense. There's also a teen comedy from a well-known director whose films all make a truckload of cash. I'd play a high school party girl who takes over the principal's office and runs the school. Um, if I'm leaving Sam behind, I want something more mature. That's why the third film sounds so appealing. It's a chick-flick drama based on one of my favorite books, Manolos Are Meant for Small Feet. It's set in London and I would play a college freshman who unearths all this dirt about the television industry. None of the movies start shooting till the summer.