“Way to judge,” said Mandy.

I shook my head. “I can’t change … anything. Lucas, I’m sorry this is making you uncomfortable, but I never lied to you. I always told you exactly what I am, and I always told you the invasion was coming. What you did with that information is on you. It’s not on me.”

It couldn’t be on me. Over the course of my lifetime, I’d told hundreds of people—maybe even thousands—what I represented. I’d never been able to explain how one lone, human-appearing girl was supposed to jump-start an invasion, but I’d known telling them was the right thing to do, that I had to tell them, that I had to keep telling them, even when I knew they wouldn’t believe me. It was a compulsion that had defined my life. That still defined my life. If someone asked, or even looked like they might listen, they needed to know what I was.

“Oh my God.” Lucas rubbed his face with his hand. “Mandy, talk to her. Stasia, whether I believe you or not, you need to think long and hard about saying this to anyone else.”

“Why?” I asked.

“Because for at least the two days it takes to discredit that transmission, people are going to be looking for someone to blame. They’re going to be scared, and they’re going to be credulous, and they might take you seriously.”

I frowned. “So?”

“So do you really want your kneecaps broken by someone who thinks the patriotic thing to do is to strike against the invasion before it gets fully underway? I don’t want to visit you in the hospital. You need to be careful.” Lucas looked at me solemnly. There was no levity in his face: for better or for worse, he meant every word he was saying. “Even if this is all a joke you don’t know how to stop telling, you need to be careful. Otherwise, you’re going to be dead.”

He turned on his heel then, heading for the door. Mandy stood.

“Lucas—” she began.

“Stay home. Watch a movie. Keep each other safe. I’m going out.” With that, he stalked to the door, wrenched it open, and slammed it behind him. Mandy and I watched through the window as he stormed down the front walk to the driveway, disappearing from view.

A few seconds later, we heard the car door slam and the snarl of the engine turning over. Lucas peeled out, and we were alone. Silence reigned.

Finally, Mandy looked at me and asked, “What do you need?”

I needed the invasion to come faster. I needed it to change course and go find another planet to plunder. I needed to know I was right about myself. I needed proof that I’d been delusional all along, and the planet where I lived wasn’t about to be in danger. I needed so many big, complicated, contradictory things that I felt like I couldn’t breathe, like all those needs were sticking in my throat and cutting off my air.