OLIVE: Oh, go on. Wasn’t meant for you. I was talkin’ to Bubba—

OLIVE reappears, to shut the French windows behind her.

’S Mum—she’s comin’ in the back way.

BARNEY: [immediately taking charge] Okay. This is it, then.

He shoves the hammer somewhere out of sight.

Don’t have to say nothin’, all you got to do is stand by and look interested.

NANCY: Interested in what?

BARNEY: [picking up and brandishing the receiver] A phone call. I’m in the middle of makin’ a phone call.

NANCY: A phone call?

BARNEY: Talkin’ to the Morrises. Makin’ arrangements for the party.

OLIVE: [astonished] But the phone, the phone—when did that arrive?

ROO: [interposing] ’S not a phone, it’s just a gag. He pinched it out at Royal Park—Barney, I don’t think that this is such a—

BARNEY: Oh, c’mon. Bit of fun. Kid Emma that she’s struck it lucky.

NANCY: And they say the AIF has lost its sense of humour.

EMMA: [approaching] Olive?

BARNEY jams the receiver to his ear and, with his back to them all, starts up a phone conversation.

BARNEY: We’ll leave it up to you, Sam. I mean, you know all the old crowd, who’s around, and that—

EMMA, in outdoor clothes, with hat and handbag, appears in the hallway, unbuttoning her coat.

EMMA: You lot are goin’ to have to wait for your meal. I’m a bit late.

A general acceptance from the others, their attention on BARNEY. EMMA hangs up her hat and coat on the hallstand, and turns towards the living room, sniffing the air.

What’s that smell in here? It’s a cigar. [To ROO] You been smokin’ a cigar?

He shakes his head.

Well, someone has, I can—

Focusing on BARNEY, still with his back to her:

Oh, it was you, was it?

BARNEY: Me, what?

He turns to reveal to an incredulous EMMA the phone, as he apologises to his supposed caller.

Just hold on a bit, would you, Sam—it’s Emma.

He cups the receiver against his chest.

Sorry, won’t be long. Had to make an urgent phone call.

EMMA: [barely able to articulate] On my—my telephone?

BARNEY: Don’t worry, not long distance. Bet you thought that I was ringin’ Queensland—

EMMA: Before I even knew I had it? It was here in the house?

BARNEY: Thing is, we’ve had the word on our discharge. What I’m doin’ is ringing around, let people know—spread the word a bit—

EMMA: [on a rising note] On my phone? Ringin’ around on—no, you’re not. You get off that— [pawing the air towards the receiver] —give it to me right now—

BARNEY: [holding the receiver out of her reach] Hey, steady on—I’m talkin’ to Sam Morris. Can’t just cut him off. We’re makin’ plans—

EMMA: One minute, then. You got one minute.