Contents (32)
- Contents
- About the Book
- ONLY YOU CAN SAVE MANKIND
- Author’s Note
- Chapter 1
- The Hero With A Thousand Extra Lives
- Chapter 2
- Operate Controls To Play Game
- Chapter 3
- Cereal Killers
- Chapter 4
- ‘No one Really Dies’
- Chapter 5
- If Not You, Who Else?
- Chapter 6
- Chicken Lumps In Space
- Chapter 7
- The Dark Tower
- Chapter 8
- Peace Talks, Peace Shouts
- Chapter 9
- On Earth, No one Can Hear You Say ‘Um’
- Chapter 10
- In Space, no one Is Listening Anyway
- Chapter 11
- Humans!
- Chapter 12
- Just Like The Real Thing
- Read On
- Chapter 1
- About the Author
- BOOKS BY TERRY PRATCHETT
The Captain was stupid not to fire back.
His hand switched on the computer without his mind really being aware of it.
The game logo appeared. The music started up. The same old message scrolled up the screen. He knew it by heart. Savior of Civilization. Certain Oblivion.
Only You Can Save Mankind.
If Not You, Who Else?
He blinked. The message had scrolled off the top of the screen. He couldn’t have imagined that extra last line . . . could he?
And then the same old stars.
He didn’t touch the keyboard or the joystick. He wasn’t certain what direction he should be going in. On the whole, straight on seemed best. For hours.
He glanced at the clock. It was just gone four o’clock. People would be home from school now. They’d be watching Cobbers and She’ll Be Apples and Moonee Ponds. Bigmac would be watching with his mouth open at his brother’s. Wobbler would be watching while trying to rob some other poor computer games writer of his just rewards. Yo-less probably wouldn’t be paying much attention, exactly; it’d just be on while he did his homework. Yo-less always did his homework when he got home from school and didn’t pay attention to anything else until it had been finished to his satisfaction. But everyone watched Cobbers.
Except Johnny, today.
He felt vaguely proud of that. The television was off. He had other things to do.
Somewhere in the last ten minutes he’d made a decision. He wasn’t sure exactly what it was, but he’d made it. So he had to see it through. Whatever it was.
He went to the bathroom and had a go with the thermometer. It was an electronic one that his mother had bought from a catalogue, and it also told the time. Everything in the catalogue had a digital clock built in. Even the golf umbrella that doubled as a Handy Picnic Table. Even the thing for getting fluff out of socks.
‘Away with Not Being Able to Know What the Time is All the Time Blues,’ said Johnny vaguely, and stuck the thermometer in his mouth for the required twenty seconds.
His temperature was 16:04°.
No wonder he felt cold.
He went back to bed with the thermometer still in his mouth and looked at the screen again.
Still just stars.
The rest of them would probably be down at the mall now, unless Yo-less was trying for an A+ with his homework. Hanging out. Waiting for another day to end.
He squinted at the thermometer. It read 16:07°.
Still nothing but stars on the screen . . .

Chapter 6
Chicken Lumps In Space
He woke up. The familiar smell of the starship tickled his nose. He cast his eyes over the control panel. He was getting a bit more familiar with it now.
Right. So he was back in real life again. When he got back to . . . when he got back to . . . He’d have to have a word with the medics about this odd recurring dream that he was a boy in—