Back Oh, Money! Money!
Chapters (30)
  1. OH, MONEY! MONEY!
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  3. Contents
  4. *
  5. Chapter I - Exit Mr. Stanley G. Fulton
  6. Chapter II - Enter Mr. John Smith
  7. Chapter III - The Small Boy at the Keyhole
  8. Chapter IV - In Search of Some Dates
  9. Chapter V - In Miss Flora's Album
  10. Chapter VI - Poor Maggie
  11. Chapter VII - Poor Maggie and Some Others
  12. Chapter VIII - A Santa Claus Held Up
  13. Chapter IX - "Dear Cousin Stanley"
  14. Chapter X - What Does it Matter?
  15. Chapter XI - Santa Claus Arrives
  16. Chapter XII - The Toys Rattle Out
  17. Chapter XIII - The Dancing Begins
  18. Chapter XIV - From Me to You with Love
  19. Chapter XV - In Search of Rest
  20. Chapter XVI - The Fly in the Ointment
  21. Chapter XVII - An Ambassador of Cupid's
  22. Chapter XVIII - Just a Matter of Begging
  23. Chapter XIX - Still Other Flies
  24. Chapter XX - Frankenstein: Being a Letter from John Smith to Edward D. Norton, Attorney at Law
  25. Chapter XXI - Sympathies Misplaced
  26. Chapter XXII - With Every Jim a James
  27. Chapter XXIII - Reflections—Mirrored and Otherwise
  28. Chapter XXIV - That Miserable Money
  29. Chapter XXV - Exit Mr. John Smith
  30. Chapter XXVI - Reenter Mr. Stanley G. Fulton

Of course, the Frank Blaisdells are the most thrifty of the bunch—at least, Mrs. Frank, "Jane," is—and I dare say they would be the most conservative handlers of my millions. But time will tell. Anyhow, I shall be glad to see them enjoy themselves meanwhile with the hundred thousand. Maybe Mrs. Jane will be constrained to clear my room of a few of the mats and covers and tidies! I have hopes. At least, I shall surely have a vacation from her everlasting "We can't afford it," and her equally everlasting "Of course, if I had the money I'd do it." Praise be for that!—and it'll be worth a hundred thousand to me, believe me, Ned.

As for her husband—I'm not sure how he will take it. It isn't corn or peas or flour or sugar, you see, and I'm not posted as to his opinion of much of anything else. He'll spend some of it, though,—I'm sure of that. I don't think he always thoroughly appreciates his wife's thrifty ideas of economy. I haven't forgotten the night I came home to find Mrs. Jane out calling, and Mr. Frank rampaging around the house with every gas jet at full blast. It seems he was packing his bag to go on a hurried business trip. He laughed a little sheepishly—I suppose he saw my blinking amazement at the illumination—and said something about being tired of always feeling his way through pitch- dark rooms. So, as I say, I'm not quite sure of Mr. Frank when he comes into possession of the hundred thousand. He's been cooped up in the dark so long he may want to blow in the whole hundred thousand in one grand blare of light. However, I reckon I needn't worry—he'll still have Mrs. Jane—to turn some of the gas jets down!

As for the younger generation—they're fine, every one of them; and just think what this money will mean to them in education and advantages! Jim's son, Fred, eighteen, is a fine, manly boy. He's got his mother's ambitions, and he's keen for college—even talks of working his way (much to his mother's horror) if his father can't find the money to send him. Of course, that part will be all right now—in a month.

The daughter, Bessie (almost seventeen), is an exceedingly pretty girl. She, too, is ambitious—almost too much so, perhaps, for her happiness, in the present state of their pocketbook. But of course that, too, will be all right, after next month. Benny, the nine-year- old, will be concerned as little as any one over that hundred thousand dollars, I imagine. The real value of the gift he will not appreciate, of course; in fact, I doubt if he even approves of it—lest his privileges as to meals and manners be still further curtailed. Poor Benny! Now, Mellicent—