When I was done showering, Callie had gone back to sleep. I quietly headed for coffee.

Graham was sitting in the kitchen. Damn. Why was he still with us? I’d have thought Cordus would’ve wanted to keep an eye on him or something. It seemed impossible that he was just going to keep hanging out with his old crew. Talk about painful and awkward for everyone.

He looked up at me with dead eyes. It took him a while to speak. It was like he’d forgotten how. “It was your idea, wasn’t it? Calling Cordus.”

I didn’t see much point in lying. “Yeah.”

I waited for him to react, to get angry, but he didn’t say anything.

“Kara said they could be killed if they failed to close the strait. You seemed to be putting all our lives at risk.”

Again he didn’t say anything for a long time, just looked at me. Then he looked down at his hands.

“Callie finding the strait and calling Williams, Williams finding you, Williams calling in Kara — none of that should’ve happened. No one was supposed to know anything about it. No one was supposed to come here. No one was supposed to be in danger. That’s how it should’ve gone. Things always go the way they’re supposed to. Well, almost always.”

Huh. Maybe Callie had ended up testing that Graham-luck-evasion hypothesis after all, without realizing it.

“Why were you trying to keep the strait open?”

Graham shook his head. Some secrets were staying secret, I guess.

“What’re you going to do now?”

He shrugged. “Same thing I was doing before.”

But the look he gave me was so empty my throat tightened. I guess he’d gotten the same sense from Cordus that I had: second chances were pretty much in name only.

I really wished I hadn’t kissed him. I wondered how many more times I’d have that thought.

I made coffee for both of us and sat down. He took a sip or two, then seemed to forget about it and just sat there. I watched him. The day’s first sunlight came through the crack between the window blinds and touched his hair.

“Why did you lie to me?”

I hadn’t meant to ask that. It just popped out.

He looked up at me. For a moment, he looked much older than his years. When he finally spoke, he sounded tired.

“What we do, it’s ugly. It’s easier if you ease new people into it instead of dumping the whole truth on them in one go.”

“Oh yeah? Easier for who?”

He looked away, effectively silenced.

“Graham …”

“Just let it go, Elizabeth. There’s nothing I can say to you that’ll make it better.”

I sat there, surprised and saddened. I wished I understood.

“Beth,” I said.

He looked up at me, confused.