“Isn’t it great like this?” Billie said, inhaling deeply the crisp morning air, letting it sting her lungs. She was perched atop the porch railing, hugging herself to fight the autumn chill since her sweater was not enough. “It’s so clean and peaceful out this early. No screaming kids, no Big Wheels, no neighbors fighting. The world’s kind of relaxed this early, you know? At peace. It’s like the sun is cleansing the earth. God, I really love the morning. Gordon used to love it too.” She grew pensive at the recollection, but not melancholy. A smile lingered on her face. “He used to love the sunlight, warming his skin. Even after he got sick I used to wheel him out here onto the porch and we’d have breakfast and watch the sun come up. He always liked that.” She looked at the man on the porch swing across from her and blushed. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to ramble.”

“It’s okay,” Stiles said, sipping his coffee. “You still miss him. I understand.”

She shrugged. “It doesn’t hurt as much these days, but before . . . You know, sometimes I wonder if there’s a masochist hiding inside of me. I mean, first there was Mike, Bart’s dad. His death really got to me. We hadn’t been married all that long—the whole thing threw me for a loop. So when I finally get my act together again what do I do, first thing? I fall for Gordon and he gets cancer and the whole thing starts over again.” She shook her head in bewilderment. “Not that I wouldn’t do it again, mind you. I would. I really did love him. Both of them. But something about losing people, I don’t know, the hurt goes so deep you think. I’ll never do that again. Once makes you gun-shy, but twice, that gets you downright scared. I can’t say I’ve been close to anyone since Gordon. I mean really close.”

“I find that hard to believe.”

She bristled. “Meaning?”

“You’re an attractive woman. I can’t believe you haven’t had any offers.”

She blushed again and forced a laugh. “Who needs the grief? Besides, I’m kinda used to my independence now. It’s okay, really. I’ve got my kids and my work. And I’ve got me. There’s nothing wrong with being alone.”

“Nope. Only with being lonely.”