“Well, I’m sorry about that, but this is just one reason why you and I need to get back on the same track. You can’t take me for granted the way you’ve been doing. I have a life, too. I’m trying to make a difference in my own way and you need to understand that or we’re gonna have some problems.”

There was so much tension in the silence that followed, but I didn’t care. I’d always been the stand-by-my-pastor-man chick, but I’d never done that silently and I wasn’t going to be quiet about what I was feeling now.

“All right,” he acquiesced. “I’m sorry, Ginger. I didn’t mean to go off. It’s just that vote...never mind. Just know that I’m sorry.”

This would have been the moment for me to just accept his apology. And in the past, I would have done that. But Jeremy was beginning to feel a little different to me. Like he was a bit off-kilter, moving away from everything we’d built our relationship on. It was like he’d somehow started to rise above me, as if we weren’t equals.

It didn’t feel like it was time for me to ring the alarm, but there was definitely a yellow caution sign in my heart.

Finally, I said, “Jeremy, it’s fine....”

He breathed.

“But we’re really going to have to address this because something’s going on.”

“What do you mean?”

I flopped onto our bed. “You’re different. You’re changing in everything and in every way. In our relationship, the way you handle things with the church.”

“I’m not changing, at least not any way out of the normal. People change, we grow. We’re not different, we’re better. Look, I really want to talk to you about this, but uh, I’ve got to get down to the conference. I’m speaking today.”

I frowned. “I thought you were speaking yesterday. I thought that was why you had to miss the meeting.”

“Uh, yeah. Yeah, I spoke yesterday, but I’m speaking at...a workshop, this morning.”

Was Jeremy stuttering?

“Look, I’ve gotta go, but I promise you we’ll talk about this when I get home.”

“Okay, I’ll see you tonight.”

“No, tomorrow morning.”

My frown deepened. “I thought you were coming back tonight.”

“I never said that. I knew I’d be speaking yesterday and then again today. And I’m going to attend the dinner here tonight.”

“Well we have a dinner tomorrow. Did you forget we’re having dinner with the Douglases?”

“Ah, I did forget,” he said. “But that’s no problem ‘cause I’m going to fly out first thing in the morning and I’ll be there before you get out of bed. I promise, babe. And I love you. I love you so much.”

He hung up before I could tell him the same. Something didn’t feel right about that call. Jeremy stuttering and then what was up with his change of plans?

But then, I paused. Had there really been a change of plans? I squinted, trying to remember what Jeremy had told me. But now that I looked back, he hadn’t told me anything. I’d been so angry when he’d returned to the living room a little less than an hour after our blowup, I hadn’t even acknowledged his presence, not even when he’d kissed my cheek goodbye.