Back Murder Most Actual
Chapters (34)
  1. Chapter One
  2. Chapter Two
  3. Chapter Three
  4. Chapter Four
  5. Chapter Five
  6. Chapter Six
  7. Chapter Seven
  8. Chapter Eight
  9. Chapter Nine
  10. Chapter Ten
  11. Chapter Eleven
  12. Chapter Twelve
  13. Chapter Thirteen
  14. Chapter Fourteen
  15. Chapter Fifteen
  16. Chapter Sixteen
  17. Chapter Seventeen
  18. Chapter Eighteen
  19. Chapter Nineteen
  20. Chapter Twenty
  21. Chapter Twenty-One
  22. Chapter Twenty-Two
  23. Chapter Twenty-Three
  24. Chapter Twenty-Four
  25. Chapter Twenty-Five
  26. Chapter Twenty-Six
  27. Chapter Twenty-Seven
  28. Chapter Twenty-Eight
  29. Chapter Twenty-Nine
  30. Chapter Thirty
  31. Chapter Thirty-One
  32. Chapter Thirty-Two
  33. Epilogue
  34. More By Alexis Hall

Relieved to have somebody at least partially on her side, Liza launched into it. “I don’t think Vivien Ackroyd killed herself.” There was no sense beating around the bush.

For a moment there was no reply. Then the colonel said, “But we found a suicide note.”

“That she’s signed with her initials,” Liza pointed out, “probably because whoever wrote it knew that the hotel might have seen her real signature.”

Sir Richard gave an approving nod. “Good spot, old girl, but not exactly conclusive.”

“She was also still holding the pen,” explained Liza. “In her right hand. Having shot herself in the right side of the head.”

Professor Worth raised his left hand as if holding an imaginary revolver and tried to reach around to point it at his opposite temple. “Oh, that is uncomfortable. No, it seems very unlikely she’d have done that.”

“What if she wanted to kill herself but make it look like she’d been murdered?” suggested the ever-unhelpful Colonel Coleman.

“What, like in the Problem of Thor Bridge?” Liza was a little concerned that her mind had gone straight to Holmes, but she could feel guilty about fictionalising a complex situation later. “If she was going to do that, wouldn’t she not write a suicide note? Are you saying she tried to make her suicide look like a murder that somebody had tried to make look like a suicide?”

“It’s possible,” maintained the colonel with a tenacity that had probably proven really useful in the war, but now very much wasn’t.

“No, it isn’t.” Sir Richard slapped the table enthusiastically. “I’d lay five hundred pounds on it.”

Lady Tabitha leaned towards her nephew. “Dicky, dear.”

“Sorry, make that one hundred pounds. Trying to rein in the old spending.”

At the back of the room, Ruby was looking increasingly concerned. “Suppose you’re right,” she said. “Suppose there was somebody else involved. What does that mean?”

A look of steely certainty was spreading across Sir Richard’s face. “It means—that we’re being ten-green-bottles-ed.”

Ruby arched an eyebrow. “Come again?”

“You know, like the counting song. ‘Ten green bottles, hanging on a wall,’ and all that.” The significance of the allusion, Sir Richard’s tone at least was implying, should have been obvious. “‘And if one green bottle should accidentally fall, there’ll be nine green bottles hanging on a wall.’”

The expression on Ruby’s face was one of exquisite unimpressedness. “Are you saying we’re being picked off?”

Colonel Coleman shot out of his seat like a rocket out of a bottle. “Burgh, to the gun room.”

Hands covering her face, Hanna slumped back in her chair. “Can we please not introduce more firearms just when we’ve got the last one locked up again?”

“I suppose it is locked up?” added Liza.