She steeled herself, chasing away her doubts, clinging on to her right – and it was her right, she felt this most passionately – to go her own way, for once: to explore life’s possibilities, to think only of herself. She couldn’t tell him the truth, though; she couldn’t explode the known universe. If this was cowardice, she was unrepentant now, because Dan Lawrence deserved consideration too, and an explanation, and through him, she thought, she might find the key to herself.

‘Well,’ she said in a voice that indicated this discussion was ending, ‘if I’ve seemed distant and remote, I’m sorry for it. But look, I’m dealing with it.’

‘By running away.’

‘To Quorn, not to the moon! And only for a few days.’

‘Ali, you’re the absolute cornerstone of my happiness.’

‘Michael …’

‘You’re all I want, all I need.’

Well, she thought, that’s you sorted then; but what about me? She didn’t say this, of course, she only raised herself up on her toes and kissed him, a Judas kiss, and said, ‘Chill out, honey, I’ll be back by Friday.’

The moment she left, she rang Cass from the car, told her everything, because she needed to tell someone the absolute truth, even if that person had fewer scruples than anyone she knew. Still, it was a relief to spill the whole story, and Cass listened intently until Ali said, ‘So that’s it, and now he’s waiting for me in Rundle Street and I just told a whole heap of lies to get a few days clear.’

‘Join the club, darling. Or rather, join the waiting list, the club’s oversubscribed. Damn, though, I knew it! Didn’t I know it?’

‘Yeah, you knew it. But nothing’s happened yet. I could turn back, right now, with no harm done.’

‘Dan’s waiting for you at the Ex?’

‘He is, yeah.’

‘And how does that make you feel?’

‘Incredibly happy.’

‘Then you have to follow this through. I’m not ill-wishing Michael, but this is about you.’

‘It’s also about betrayal.’

‘Yeah, if you want to get all biblical.’

‘Not just Michael, the girls too.’

‘Oh, bullshit, Ali, the girls are young adults, with lives of their own.’

‘Yeah,’ Ali said. ‘But they’d never forgive me.’

‘They would. Of course they would. You’re a captive bird, Ali, you have been ever since I met you, and this guy came over here from Edinburgh and opened the cage door for you.’

‘But just pleasing myself … I don’t know, it’s not me, it’s not my style, causing pain.’

Cass sighed. ‘Y’know, Ali, loss of reputation can be liberating, once you let go of the person you think everyone wants you to be. Trust me, I know what I’m talking about. Follow this through, and see where it takes you.’