Back Mix Tape
Chapters (37)
  1. Cover
  2. About the Author
  3. MIX TAPE
  4. Dedication
  5. 1
  6. 2
  7. 3
  8. 4
  9. 5
  10. 6
  11. 7
  12. 8
  13. 9
  14. 10
  15. 11
  16. 12
  17. 13
  18. 14
  19. 15
  20. 16
  21. 17
  22. 18
  23. 19
  24. 20
  25. 21
  26. 22
  27. 23
  28. 24
  29. 25
  30. 26
  31. 27
  32. 28
  33. 29
  34. 30
  35. Song Credits
  36. Acknowledgements
  37. THIS IS JUST THE BEGINNING

Mr Lawrence said, ‘Nay, Alison, there’s nowt to be sorry about,’ but his wife said, ‘Sorry for what?’

‘Marion,’ said Bill. ‘Gently.’

‘Alison, what exactly are you saying?’

Mrs Lawrence’s searching voice. Mr Lawrence’s sorrowful face. The watchful black eyes of all those birds.

‘I have to go,’ Alison said. She darted out of the loft, and Mrs Lawrence, who wasn’t anything like as nimble, but was determined to discover at least part of the truth behind this drama, flashed a look of annoyance at Bill – for being useless, for being soft-hearted – then followed her down the garden and back into the house.

‘Alison!’ she said. ‘What am I to tell our Daniel?’

Alison stopped on the threshold of the front door. ‘Tell him I’m sorry about the gig,’ she said. ‘Tell him I’m really, really sorry. But I’ve got to get back. This isn’t right, I shouldn’t be here. I’m sorry, Mrs Lawrence.’ She stepped out into the street, and began to walk away. She was two buses away from home. What if Peter had suffered some injury she wasn’t aware of, a delayed reaction she hadn’t considered? What’d she been thinking? She’d thought, she supposed, that she could forget herself, forget everything, with Daniel, but all she’d forgotten was that he wouldn’t be here, and now she was in the wrong place altogether. She didn’t belong in Nether Edge without Daniel.

‘And what shall I tell him happened?’

Mrs Lawrence was having to call to Alison down the quiet Saturday-afternoon street now, standing at the gate to their small front garden. This wasn’t very respectable in their tree-lined avenue, but she didn’t care if anyone heard, she just wanted answers; but Alison said nothing, only kept walking.

‘Alison! Is there something our Daniel needs to know?’

Again, nothing.

‘Alison!’ Mrs Lawrence said again, raising her voice further still, and now Alison stopped and turned around. She looked wretched, Marion thought: wretched, and sort of defeated, and possibly – because of this – dangerous. This girl was no good for her boy.

‘I love him, Mrs Lawrence,’ Alison said. ‘I love him, that’s what your Daniel needs to know. Please don’t worry, everything’s fine.’

She raised a hand, a half-farewell, turned away again, and walked out of sight.