“What Liz thought of me.”

“She wants you back,” Audrey said softy. “I’d say she thinks pretty highly of you.”

“Not what she thinks now. What she thought of me back then.” He continued to watch his friend. “I’m not marriage minded. You know that. I know that. But the truth is, I didn’t really know that until she told me I wasn’t.”

“Elizabeth told you you didn’t want to get married?” Audrey asked skeptically.

“Not exactly. She told me I wasn’t marriage material.”

Her eyes bugged a little in outraged surprised, and she scowled. “That horrible—”

“No,” he said, holding up a hand. “She was right. But the real kicker is, I was actually trying. When she and I were dating, for the first time in my life, I was trying to be different. Better. You know how I was as a teen. And in college. I was a classic playboy who thought the world couldn’t hurt me, and I didn’t care who I hurt.”

“You never hurt me.”

Which is sort of my point.

“I was a nightmare of a kid, but right around the time I met Liz, I got the job at York and decided if I was going to be a grown-up in my professional life, I should be one in my personal life as well. So I dated exactly the sort of woman my mother wanted me to find. I bought the flowers. I didn’t so much as look at another woman. I learned to cook.”

“You did?” She looked fascinated, as though she didn’t even know him.

“I didn’t say I learned to cook well. But I did every damned husbandly thing I could think of.”

“And she threw it back in your face,” Audrey said quietly.

“Worse,” Clarke said with a wry smile. “She didn’t even notice any of my efforts. She got that job offer in DC, and selfishly, I wasn’t thrilled. I didn’t want to leave New York. But I was thinking, ‘Okay, this is what committed people do. We’ll figure it out.’ Only she didn’t want to figure it out. Not with me. That burned the most. I don’t even think she considered it. It seemed to be a non-option in her mind.”

He took a gulp of the champagne, annoyed that though the memory had dulled over time, it still hurt his ego. At least now he could admit that it was ego, and not something far more damaging.