“Oh, I’m headed to UCLA next—” Logan begins, but then must feel the steam rising off my skin.

Anger might be all I’m capable of projecting, but really, I feel like I might vomit.

“Let’s just see what’s in the records,” Logan finishes instead, unable to look at me.

Which is fine, because I already feel unseen as all hell.

Click here

Seidon stares back at me. It’s an odd stare, like he’s somehow trying to figure me out.

“Then we agree,” he finally says, perhaps ignoring—or perhaps embracing—the subtext of my answer. “And getting this deck away from my family is the best way to prove that.”

“In that case, all three of us agree,” Logan says, stepping beside me.

Logan believes in a higher power, but I know he doesn’t believe in “powers.” He’d just call it psychic energy tapping into universal flow. I’m sure he thinks all of this is spiritual, not supernatural. Human, not superhuman.

I still might not be sure exactly what I believe, but in this case, I can definitely agree. This all feels particularly, painfully human.

Seidon looks back at us, at Logan and me standing together, and suddenly it’s as if a charge opens up in the room. There’s silence for a few more beats.

“You know, I didn’t only bring you boys up here because my mom asked,” Seidon begins. “I kind of knew the house would be empty…”

Seidon’s eyes slide from mine to Logan’s and a stone forms in my stomach.

Oh. No. There’s no way I could… I mean, I’m not ready to… Oh god, what if Logan wants to…

“That’s very flattering,” Logan answers. “But we’re not there yet.”

Logan puts a hand on my shoulder and Seidon stares at it, intensely.

“Shame,” Seidon says, shrugging his shoulders. “Well, you know where to find me if you ever change your mind.”

If Seidon feels embarrassed or rejected, he doesn’t show it. Though he maybe seems to feel somewhat… left out? He turns to the safe and I flush with relief, but not much.

Because I’m the one who really feels left out. At best, I’m the wet blanket of his scenario. At worst, I’m the consolation prize.

Click here

Seidon opens the safe and rifles through the files piled inside. I’m so lost in my thoughts, I have no idea how long he does this. It could be seconds or it could be minutes, but next thing I know, Seidon turns and stands again.

“Here it is,” he says, opening the file. “There actually isn’t much in here, mostly photos of Uncle Carson working on the deck. But this was at the top.”

Seidon then hands me a UPS tracking receipt from a decade ago.