Curran picked up the smaller rock with both hands and threw it onto the larger boulder. The boulder cracked and fell apart. Oops.

“Sorry we broke your rock.”

Atsany took the pipe out of his mouth and said something.

“Mrrrhhhm,” Astamur said.

“What did he say?”

“He said that the man must be your husband, because only someone we love very much can make us this crazy.”

Curran kicked the remains of the boulder, spun, and marched toward me.

I crossed my arms.

“I thought you were dead! And you’re here, sitting around the fire, eating and . . .”

“Listening to fairy tales.” Helpful, that’s me. “We’re about to have s’mores and you’re not invited.”

Curran opened his mouth. His gaze paused on Atsany. He blinked. “What the fuck?”

“Don’t stare. You’ll hurt his feelings.”

Atsany nodded at Curran in a solemn way.

Curran shook his head and pivoted toward me. “I almost killed B. The only reason she’s alive right now is because she had to show me where you fell.”

“Oh, so Princess Wilson let you out of the castle? Did she have to sign your permission slip? You got a hall pass, woo-hoo!”

“So this is what it’s about? This is your mature response—to go off into the mountains rather than talking about it and have s’mores with a gnome and a mountain man.”

“Yep.”

“What’s your plan for tomorrow? Brunch with a unicorn?”

“As long as it doesn’t involve you, it’s fine with me.”

“So really? That’s it, just like that.” Curran turned around. “Wait a minute. Where is Hugh? Shouldn’t he be flexing for you?”

“I’m surprised you noticed.”

He squeezed his hands into fists. I picked up a grapefruit-sized rock and handed it to him. It went flying. Home run, Beast Lord style.

“I noticed. I just can’t do anything about it.”

“You know what the difference is? Hugh can stand there and flex all he wants. I can’t control what he does. I can control what I do and I don’t encourage him. You let her parade in front of you naked. You told me you had no interest in her and then you invited her to sit at the table in my chair. You went on a little rendezvous with her where you explained how you were lonely and cried about all the sacrifices you made by being with me.”

His eyes sparked with gold. “You. That was you on the balcony.”

“You spend every waking moment with her, while I get told endlessly that nobody has to answer any of my questions, because I’m clearly on my way out and she’s on her way in and since we’re not married, I’m easy to replace.”

“You want to get married? I’ll marry you right now. Is the gnome a preacher, because I’ll do it.”