“Don’t bullshit me,” he said hoarsely. “I’m no good at this, Welga. I don’t enjoy risking my life, and I don’t like being in pain. Shield work was never supposed to be serious. The Machinehood is.” He switched back to text. I’m not a fighter, not like you. The leadership of Eko-Yi preaches peace, living a compassionate life. It’s what I want. Maybe what I need, too. I thought you’d agree with me.

Her heart ached at his bruised, exhausted expression. He had waited for her through all her Raider missions early in their relationship. He’d supported her transition to life as a shield, going so far as to leave the JIA when she left the service. Why the hell did they win their seats now? She didn’t want to make this choice any more than he did, but Organica was her only chance to go after the Machinehood and put the ghosts of Marrakech to rest. It’s not fair.

“Don’t do this, please. Not right now,” Welga said. “The minute the agency decides they don’t need me, I’ll head home. But, cardo, don’t make me choose between you and this mission. You’ve seen what the Machinehood has done. I want to go up there with you, but this is so much bigger than us. I might be one of the few people who can—who can do what has to be done. I can’t—”

“No, I can’t!” he interrupted. “I can’t stand the thought of watching you destroy yourself again for the same people who drove you away the first time. You don’t owe this to anyone.”

“I owe it to myself.”

He brushed at his eyes, breathing hard.

“What if…,” Welga said. Her stomach knotted at what she was about to propose. “What if you go first, without me? They’ll give me priority later on, as your life partner.”

“And leave you in the middle of all this?” He swept his arm in a wide arc.

“You can’t help me with this.” She mimicked his gesture.

He stayed silent for several breaths, then shook his head. “If I leave the planet, and you… don’t come home, I’ll never forgive myself. We’re doing this together or not at all. Just like last time.”

Welga blinked back a sudden rush of tears. “Hold on to those seats as long as they’ll let you. I’ll send you a message when I know what’s happening next. I love you.”

Connor’s expression stayed bleak, but he touched two fingers to his lips and reached them forward. “Love you too.”

She returned the virtual kiss and jogged toward the office. We’ll get up there one day, Connor, I promise.