‘Oh!’ she squeaks. ‘Oh! Oh!’

I look to my dad for help. He gives a dainty shrug and tenses his jaw; his brow. He’s not going to help. He’s helpless.

I stand like piggy in the middle between my mum and Trish, there to stop any forward advances my mum is likely to make. Only, she knows me too well. She guesses my tactic, and like a top-scoring Premiership striker, slips past me the opposite way from my block, and her hands grip Trish’s forearms.

‘Of course,’ my mum says. ‘I can see the resemblance now. He was the image of you.’

Hmm. He wasn’t, but—

‘Did you meet him?’ Trish asks, quite genuinely.

My mum shakes her head. ‘Our Chloe sent me photos on that WhatsApp.’

Trish never got a photo of me, did she? Of course not. Jack never sent one. Not that I asked him to, or expected him to; it’s just that right now, I wish he had. My mum’s talking to Trish about God now, saying how she’ll be remembering Jack in her prayers. My dad’s removed his coat and is hovering, looking for somewhere to hang it.

‘I’m speechless,’ my mum says, vomiting words. ‘Just speechless.’

If I turn right, I could snatch my keys and leg it to the Sainsbury’s Local as planned.

Or, if I turn left, I can hide in the bathroom. That old trick.

I go for the latter.

Letting the cold water run, I dab the back of my neck with a few splashes, not wanting to smudge my red lipstick. I’ve made an effort today, and believe me, that really puts the word effort to its full use. And I mean, fuck. My mum and dad are here, in my new flat, which isn’t new and isn’t mine. Not for much longer anyway. I’m being evicted, which was to be expected, but once again, the decision about when to end the special entity of me and Jack is being taken away ruthlessly. I need a steady pace; I need to let our story play out, please.

I look up, hopeful of seeing Jack in the mirror. Nothing. So I reach into the shower and take hold of his shower gel. Opening the lid, I inhale the aroma of bergamot and try to feel him; find him. And shit! I drop the bottle. An ache engulfs me.

No, please, please, no. No.

I bend, pull down my knickers and sit on the toilet.

Another first.