‘I have a sort of plan,’ Faith sort of assures me. We carry on walking up the stairs towards the top floor. ‘I popped in to see Adrian. He told me your sponsor went bust, nothing to do with ratings, so let’s not worry too much about that.’ Adrian, a strapping twenty-five-year-old, sells advertising here at SC6. Faith and he had a hot fling that ended mutually amicably a few months ago. ‘Gracie, what we need is an angle.’

‘An angle?’

‘What’s your USP?’

‘My US–what?’

‘Your unique selling point.’ Faith smiles at me sweetly. She can’t cook and I don’t understand most of the business stuff she does. We get to the top of the stairs. ‘What’s the hook that’s uniquely you, darling?’

I figure it’s like Heston Blumenthal and his molecular gastronomy, his odd combinations of bacon-and-egg ice cream and snail porridge dishes that taste scrumptious on account of the ingredients being ‘molecularly compatible’. Gordon Ramsay has his expletives, Jamie Oliver his fifteen-minute meals. Nigella has butter-rich recipes and her hourglass figure – she reminds me I don’t need to be size 0 to be popular. Mary Berry had a big tent.

What’s my unique selling point?

‘I don’t know what my hook is, Faith, but Jordan suggested sex sells,’ is the best I can come up with at short notice.

‘Ha!’

We exit the landing. The top floor is desolate, the offices empty. Titan has cleaned out most of the incumbent executives, too.

‘Yes, well. Ironically, I accused him of wearing green underpants to bed to avoid having sex with me,’ I divulge, walking steadily on. Faith stops me sharp.

‘Gracie, what did you say?’ Fit for laughing, she composes herself promptly. ‘Sounds like someone forgot to take his HRT?’

Hormone replacement therapy – I wish they made it for men.

I talk to Faith about most things. But I haven’t before mentioned my sexual dry spell. In the face of how easily she drifts from one banging fling to another, it seems so… excruciating. Not that Faith is here to judge me.

‘Gracie, my love, with that face – and those heels – Jordan won’t resist you tonight,’ she says.

I do feel remarkably good about myself right now, with this new look. Also, Zelda’s stone is in my coat pocket on set. With a bit of luck, that’ll be attracting unconditional romance my way. We’ll see how this meeting goes. But maybe it’s not a bad idea for me to throw myself at Jordan this evening, see if he doesn’t resist?

‘Faith, what would I do without you?’

‘And I you?’

We arrive at the imposing oak doors of the meeting room.

Turning to me with one eyebrow arched – it’s Faith’s thing and it packs a punch – Faith says, ‘You know, it’s some angle… getting steamy in the kitchen. Sex sells. I like it.’