“Then I quit,” I whispered numbly.

Lena straightened.

Pallas turned to stare at me, her forehead crinkled in confusion. “Excuse me?”

“I resign from the Porters. You want it in writing? Give me a pen.” I would have said more, but I was having trouble finding words.

“What are you doing, Isaac?” Lena whispered.

I felt like I was struggling to swallow a rock. I kept my focus on Pallas. If I looked at Lena, I’d lose it. “You’re the Regional Master of the Porters. So be it. If I’m no longer a Porter, then you have no right to hold me here.”

“There are laws governing the use of magic—” Pallas began.

“And if I break them after I leave, you’re welcome to haul my ass back here,” I snapped. “Until then, I’d appreciate it if you and your dogs got the hell out of my way.”

My car was parked on the edge of the dirt driveway. My jacket and books were in the back, save those Pallas had shipped to Philadelphia. It wasn’t until I settled the familiar weight onto my shoulders that I realized how vulnerable and naked I had felt without it.

Smudge started running laps on the dashboard the instant I let him out of the cage. “Sorry, partner. I’m not too happy about being locked up for four days, either.”

Lena retrieved her bokken from the trunk and climbed into the passenger’s seat. “Do you have an actual plan?”

“Find the libriomancer. Save Nidhi. I’m working on the details.” I was also trying very hard not to think about what would come next. About what I had just thrown away. I jammed the key into the ignition and started the engine. “Tell me what happened after I passed out.”

“I tried to wake you. So did Smudge.” She reached out to touch the burnt hole on my shirt. “When that didn’t work, I called Nicola. She said to bring you here. You heard the rest.”

“That’s it?” I shook my head, not buying it. “You’ve just been waiting for four days while Nidhi—”

“I thought you were dying, Isaac. You were cold, sweaty, and shivering, muttering to yourself in a language I couldn’t understand.”

“What would you have done if I didn’t wake up?”

She looked away. “I couldn’t leave you, but if you didn’t recover soon and the Porters didn’t find the other libriomancer . . .”

“You meant to take me back to Detroit. To trade me for Nidhi Shah.”

She raised her chin. “That’s right.”

It was the logical choice. Trade the comatose libriomancer who might never awaken for the lover who was very much alive. Logic did nothing to alleviate this new emotional sucker punch to my gut. “How exactly did Pallas react when you told her how I had found the other libriomancer, and the thing that came through the book after us?”