YOUNG MASTER. You needn’t be shy in front of me. Or in front of anyone . . . someone as pretty as you. Honestly, Marie, you’re . . . You know, even your hair smells wonderful.

MAID. Master Alfred.

YOUNG MASTER. Don’t give me that, Marie . . . I’ve seen you . . . The other evening, when I came in late. I went out to the kitchen for a glass of water . . . Your door was open, and . . . the cover had slid off your bed . . .

MAID (covers her face). God, I never thought you could be so –

YOUNG MASTER. And I saw you then, all right. I saw this, and this, and . . . this . . . and . . .

MAID. Master Alfred . . .

YOUNG MASTER. Come on . . . here . . . yes, like that . . . that’s right . . .

MAID. But what if someone rings the doorbell . . .

YOUNG MASTER. Stop fussing . . . anyway, they can wait . . .

The doorbell rings.

YOUNG MASTER. Bloody hell . . . What a racket. Maybe he rang earlier and we didn’t hear.

MAID. Oh, I was listening out the whole time.

YOUNG MASTER. Well, go and have a look. Just through the peep-hole, mind.

MAID. Master Alfred, you’re, so . . . well, bad.

YOUNG MASTER. Just go and see who it is, will you.

She does herself up hurriedly and goes out. He quickly lets up the blinds.

MAID (coming back). Well, whoever it was, they’ve gone. No one there. It could have been Dr Schüller.

YOUNG MASTER (disagreeable). That’ll be all.

She goes to him and he moves away.

Right, Marie, I’m off now. To the café –

MAID (tenderly). Couldn’t you stay for a little while? It’d be so nice . . .

YOUNG MASTER (strictly). I’m going to the café. If Dr Schüller calls . . .

MAID. He’s not coming back today.

YOUNG MASTER (more strictly). If Dr Schüller calls, I’ll be . . . in the café.

Goes. She takes a cigar from the table, puts it in her pocket and leaves.

4. The Young Master and the Young Wife