“Stop critiquing yourself! Enjoy this!” Manon gave me an affectionate shake before returning to the boards to stand with Bill to watch Theo’s performance.

In a daze, I nodded to well-wishers and submitted to hugs before taking my spot in the middle chair in the contenders’ waiting area. Kuznetzov gave me a half-hug before taking the chair to my right. Massimo moved over to my left, bumping the Japanese skater, who’d now likely finish fifth.

There were three cameras ready to cut to us for reactions after Theo’s skate and a monitor showing his program. Mick Jagger’s voice filled the arena. Now all I could do was sit and wait and be a good sport no matter what happened. Top rivals in skating had to put on fake smiles now more than ever with cameras in our faces constantly.

My top rival.

It didn’t seem a remotely adequate way to describe Theodore Sullivan. Who was he now? A friend? My lover? Just thinking that word sent a thrill down my spine.

He had been my lover. And now he knew how gullible and foolish I’d been. That shame lingered. But how long could I let that poison stay in my system?

It was only when Theo put a hand down on his quad Sal that I realized I’d been watching him on the TV screen without truly paying attention.

The audience’s gasping “oh!” of surprise was loud, followed by a flurry of applause to cheer him on for the next element, which was the quad Lutz combo in the second half of the program.

He rushed the takeoff.

Without enough height, he under-rotated the Lutz and could barely tack on a weak double toe. It was the kind of mistake he’d have made before going to Mr. Webber: lack of concentration. Sometimes we all slipped back into old habits under stress. I knew the feeling, and my heart hurt for him.

“Holy shit,” Kuznetsov muttered. “Henry, you might have this.”

The three of us watched the screen in tense silence. My gaze zeroed in on the technical score tracker on the top left corner. My score was there beside the word: Leader. Below it, Theo’s score was being tallied as he skated. The GOE for the Lutz combination was highlighted in red with a -2.23.

As usual, Theo didn’t let any mistakes detract from his performance aside from several seconds where I could tell he’d lost focus after the mistake. Then he turned on the charm and gave the audience everything he had. In return, they gave him a deserved standing ovation, and I clapped for him too.

I watched the replays, my pulse racing, the buzzing setting in again. The hand down on the Sal was a relatively minor mistake. A point and a half lost on GOE.

But the quad Lutz would be examined by the technical specialist, who would surely deem it under-rotated, bringing down the base value. Theo was ahead after the short program, but would it be enough?