Nick passed Libby some strawberries. “First of the season. Dad picked them this morning.”

She shook her head.

“Jess doesn’t have an appetite either.”

It was the first time he’d mentioned her in a few days. Weeks earlier, when Jess was first discharged, Nick had invited Libby to the meeting with Jess and Peter where formal arrangements were being discussed regarding Leo. Libby knew there’d been subsequent meetings, not only because Nick had asked her to attend, but because he always went to great lengths to reassure her that he never saw Jess on his own—Karen, Peter or Alice were always present. Libby loved him for that as much as she hated his lack of understanding that Jess’s diagnosis didn’t mean her instant forgiveness.

Her mother gave Libby terse updates about Jess’s condition whether she wanted to hear them or not. Libby hadn’t mentioned her unknown grandfather or her mother’s brutal assessment of Libby’s behavior to her therapist. Teresa had suggested that the fact Libby listened to Karen talking about Jess meant she either cared enough to want to know or was using it as a form of flagellation. Acutely uncomfortable with all scenarios, Libby had tartly told Teresa that she had little choice but to listen, because Karen in full flight was an unstoppable force.

According to Karen, Jess was no longer able to spend a full day out of bed. She was having ascites drained to relieve breathlessness, her pain medication was being increased and other than cuddles and stories, she could no longer care for Leo. Alice was doing the lion’s share of caring for the child and Nick covered the weekends. Although in deference to Libby, Nick wasn’t on the sleepover roster. He hadn’t even suggested it.

“The thing about Jess’s appetite,” Nick continued, “is she can’t do anything to bring it back.”

And they were back to the circular argument. “I can’t forgive her.”

“I’m not asking you to do that.”

“That’s a first.”

“No. It’s your mother who wants you to forgive her. I’ve never asked you to do that.”

She did know that. Just like she understood his loyalty to her. Although Nick took responsibility for his part, he hated the act of betrayal Jess had inflicted on them both. But he no longer hated Jess. Libby found that a hard pill to swallow.

“Libs, you keep saying if you go and see her, she’ll win.”

The familiar tension inside her tightened a notch. “She will.”

“I think if you don’t go and see her, she’ll win.”

“That makes no sense.”