‘You mean they want to be called,’ Wobbler paused for thought, ‘post-senior citizens.’

‘Breathily challenged,’ said Yo-less.

‘Vertically disadvantaged,’ said Wobbler.

‘What? You mean they’re short?’ said Yo-less.

‘Buried,’ said Wobbler.

‘How about zombies?’ said Bigmac.

‘No, you’ve got to have a body to be a zombie,’ said Yo-less. ‘You’re not really dead, you just get fed this secret voodoo mixture of fish and roots and you turn into a zombie.’

‘Wow. What mixture?’

‘I don’t know. How should I know? Just some kind of fish and some kind of root.’

‘I bet it’s a real adventure going down the chippie in voodoo country,’ said Wobbler.

‘Well, you ought to know about voodoo,’ said Bigmac.

‘Why?’ said Yo-less.

‘’Cos you’re West Indian, right?’

‘Do you know all about druids?’

‘No.’

‘There you are, then.’

‘I ’spect your mum knows about it, though,’ said Bigmac.

‘Shouldn’t think so. My mum spends more time in church than the Pope,’ said Yo-less. ‘My mum spends more time in church than God.’

‘You’re not taking this seriously,’ said Johnny severely. ‘I really saw them.’

‘It might be something wrong with your eyes,’ said Yo-less. ‘Perhaps there’s a—’

‘I saw this old film once, about a man with X-ray eyes,’ said Bigmac. ‘He could use ’em to see right through things.’

‘Women’s clothes and stuff?’ enquired Wobbler.

‘There wasn’t much of that,’ said Bigmac.

They discussed this waste of a useful talent.

‘I don’t see through anything,’ said Johnny, eventually. ‘I just see people who aren’t ther— I mean, people other people don’t see.’

‘My uncle used to see things other people couldn’t see,’ said Wobbler. ‘Especially on a Saturday night.’

‘Don’t be daft. I’m trying to be serious.’

‘Yeah, but once you said you’d seen a Loch Ness Monster in your goldfish pond,’ said Bigmac.

‘All right, but—’

‘Probably just a plesiosaur,’ said Yo-less. ‘Just some old dinosaur that ought to’ve been extinct seventy million years ago. Nothing special at all.’

‘Yes, but—’

‘And then there was the Lost City of the Incas,’ said Wobbler.

‘Well, I found it, didn’t I?’

‘Yes, but it wasn’t that lost,’ said Yo-less. ‘Behind Tesco’s isn’t exactly lost.’

Bigmac sighed.

‘You’re all weird,’ he said.

‘All right,’ said Johnny. ‘You all come down there after school, right?’

‘Well—’ Wobbler began, and shifted uneasily.

‘Not scared, are you?’ said Johnny. He knew that was unfair, but he was annoyed. ‘You ran away before,’ he said, ‘when the Alderman came out.’

‘I never saw no Alderman,’ said Wobbler. ‘Anyway, I wasn’t scared. I ran away to wind you up.’

‘You certainly had me fooled,’ said Johnny.

‘Me? Scared? I watched Night of the Killer Zombies three times – with freeze frame,’ said Wobbler.

‘All right, then. You come. All three of you come. After school.’

‘After Cobbers,’ said Bigmac.

‘Look, this is a lot more important than—’

‘Yes, but tonight Janine is going to tell Mick that Doraleen took Ron’s surfboard—’

Johnny hesitated.

‘All right, then,’ he said. ‘After Cobbers.’