I’m standing in the doorway, and his hand is trailing across my shoulder, right before he bites into me with all the strength in his jaw.

His forehead rests gently against mine and in an instant, I’m transferred back to that night.

I’m on this same bed beneath him when he slams his head against mine so hard I have to get six stitches.

My body becomes unresponsive to his. The anger begins to roll back over me. His mouth stops moving against mine when he feels me freeze.

When he pulls back and looks down on me, I don’t even have to say anything. Our eyes, locked together, speak more naked truths than our mouths ever have. My eyes are telling his that I can no longer stand being touched by him. His eyes are telling mine that he already knows.

He begins to nod, slowly.

He backs away from me, crawling down my body until he’s at the edge of the bed with his back to me. He’s still nodding as he comes to a slow stand, fully aware that he’s not getting my forgiveness tonight. He begins heading toward my bedroom door.

“Wait,” I say to him.

He half-turns, looking back at me from the doorway.

I lift my chin, looking at him with finality. “I wish this baby wasn’t yours, Ryle. With everything that I am, I wish this baby was not a part of you.”

If I thought his world couldn’t crumble more, I was wrong.

He walks out of my bedroom and I press my face into my pillow. I thought if I could just hurt him like he had hurt me, I would feel avenged.

I don’t.

Instead, I feel vindictive and mean.

I feel like I’m my father.

Chapter Thirty-One

Mom: I miss you. When am I going to see you?

I stare at the text. It’s been two days since Ryle found out I’m pregnant. I know it’s time to tell my mother. I’m not nervous about telling her I’m pregnant. The only thing that scares me is discussing my situation with Ryle with her.

Me: Miss you, too. I’ll come over tomorrow afternoon. Can you make lasagna?

As soon as I close out the text to her, I get another incoming text.

Allysa: Come upstairs and eat dinner with us tonight. It’s homemade pizza night.

I haven’t been to Allysa’s in a few days. Since before Ryle came home. I’m not sure where he’s staying, but I assume it’s with them. The last thing I want right now is to have to be in the same apartment as him.

Me: Who all will be there?

Allysa: Lily . . . I wouldn’t do that to you. He’s working until 8 tomorrow morning. It’ll just be the three of us.

She knows me way too well. I text her back and tell her I’ll come over as soon as I finish up with work.

• • •

“What do babies eat at this age?”