Then I imagined holding Rose’s hand, walking over the spongy ground through bright ferns, the sound of water trickling nearby, the way her hair smelled when we’d been running hard. And I knew that I could. I could do anything—I would do anything—to get back home.

✦✦✦ ✦✦✦ ✦✦✦

I woke up to two nurses, one checking my pulse, the other sliding the thin curtain along its curved pole so that my bed was surrounded by fabric and the suggestion of privacy.

“How you feeling?” The one holding my wrist with gentle fingers smiled. It was such a rare and true smile that I suddenly had space to not feel okay.

“Lousy.”

She released my hand and wrote some numbers on a clipboard, then placed it at the foot of my bed. Her long braids were held back with an elastic, revealing small gold hoops up each earlobe all the way to the cartilage. “I bet.”

The second nurse wore pink blush on her dark skin and had kind eyes. She rubbed the metal circle of her stethoscope on her own stomach to warm it up before placing it under my shirt. These small acts of kindness were tearing me apart.

“I’m May, this is Alice, and we’re here to help. Now, do me a favor and take a deep breath.” She filled her own lungs to demonstrate. When she was done listening to my chest, she added data to the clipboard, and they both stood, one shorter, both in pink scrubs, side by side at the foot of the bed.

“You get brought in by yourself?” May asked.

I hesitated. Was this another trick? Another way to pump me for information, only this time with niceties? Maybe they were a part of the underground network that helped Natives escape. Or maybe they were using the system to catch us before we made the first move. Them being here now, right after Mitch brought up the Program…it just seemed a little too convenient. I had to keep my head on straight, especially now that Mitch had shown me a way out.

“Yeah. So?”

They exchanged looks. Alice spoke next. “No one’s out there waiting for you? Nowhere to run back to?”

“No. I’m alone.” I folded my arms over my chest. “You can tell Mitch that. I have no intel to give. And I’m all-in for the Program, so he can stop checking.” I turned over in my bed and closed my eyes. If this was another test, I intended to pass.

I heard the curtain being pulled back, and then I was alone once more. I smothered the small spin of panic and regret in my stomach with a palm pushed against my belly button.

Just before dark, the same Watchmen as before came to collect me. I was put into a wheelchair and strapped down. They were silent as they loaded me up, signed a form on a clipboard held out by a doctor, and took me out into the hall. This time we took an elevator. When the door slid shut, the larger one, who was pushing the chair, leaned down until his mouth was beside my ear.