‘Maybe she is Fred,’ I say. ‘It could be short for Winifred—or maybe just a code name.’

‘Could be.’ Thistle settles against the back of the sofa. It creaks ominously, and she leans forwards again.

‘None of this tells us where Shannon is now, though,’ I say. ‘Or Fred. And we still don’t know why those dates were highlighted on the wall planner, or where the bodies are.’

‘Or why Shannon brought Biggs’s severed hand back to the college,’ Thistle says.

I clear my throat. ‘Right.’

‘We’ll get there, though.’ Thistle tops up her drink and holds the bottle over mine. ‘More?’

‘Aren’t you driving soon?’ I ask.

‘You want me out of here.’ Her voice is flat.

I don’t know what to say.

‘I figured you out, Blake,’ she says.

My heart hammers my ribs. ‘You did, huh?’

‘Yeah. I believed you when you said I wasn’t your type. But don’t think I haven’t noticed the way you’ve been looking at me these past few days. And clearly you haven’t been pursuing anyone else.’ She looks around at my derelict lounge room. ‘You’re just afraid of intimacy.’

Not what I expected. ‘I’ve been trying to date,’ I say.

‘Stop lying to me,’ she snaps. ‘A guy like you would have a girlfriend if he wanted one.’

I try to work out if that was a compliment.

‘I need you to make up your mind,’ Thistle says. ‘I don’t have time for this.’

‘I’m not afraid of you,’ I say. Her anger is contagious. I rejected her to keep her safe, and now she’s giving me hell for it.

‘Bullshit. You’re not as good a liar as you think you are, Blake. You were scared of having sex with me, so you told a stupid lie. When I still wanted a relationship, you told another one. You lied to me again just now, when you said you’d been trying to date. You’re a virgin, and you’re terrified of sex.’

My frustration and exhaustion and anxiety all bubble over. ‘I’m not—’

‘It’s almost funny, given all the shit that doesn’t scare you.’

‘You’re better off without me,’ I snap. ‘Can’t you see that?’

We stare at each other in silence for a moment. She’s confused. I’m on dangerous ground, but I can’t stop myself. I’m just too tired to lie anymore.

‘I’m a bad person,’ I continue. ‘I’m sick in the head, okay? The only decent thing I ever did in my whole life was push you away.’

‘Oh, so this was for my own good?’ She looks incredulous.

‘You have no idea how much I wanted you. But you’re a good person, and you don’t deserve to get stuck with an asshole like me.’

Tears sting the corners of my eyes. I blink them away.