Time passed; the moon went from dark to full. Mother was persuaded by Muirrin that bed rest was in order and ceased to come down for meals. Several times a day I went in to see her. It helped her to know that the household continued to be run according to her rules. No mouse would poke its head into the food stores, no sheet would be inadequately laundered, no spider would dare build a web in a cupboard while I was in charge. Mother’s ankles were swollen and puffy; her face had the same unhealthy look, but her eyes were full of confidence. She praised me for my efforts and expressed a certain pleased surprise that I had apparently managed to absorb all she had tried to teach me over the last few years. I had sometimes thought her too dedicated to perfection in the house; I had wished she would adopt a more relaxed approach. Now I began to realize just how like her I was. Did she, too, maintain the rituals of a perfect household principally to keep her fears at bay?

Two days after full moon the weather turned especially benign. The sun shone, flowers bloomed and the forest came alive with the music of birds and insects about their spring business. Over breakfast in the hall, Father said, “Clodagh, it’s time you had a day off. Aidan has asked me if he can take you and your sisters out riding.”

Before I could think what to say, a huge smile lit up Eilis’s face. “Oh, please can we go, Clodagh? Please, please? We could take a picnic up to the Pudding Bowl and go fishing.” The Pudding Bowl was our family name for a little round lake up in the hills, half a morning’s ride from the keep.

Coll was beaming too. Even Sibeal looked enthusiastic in her quiet way. I glanced across to the table where Johnny’s guards were seated. Aidan was avoiding my eye. It was Cathal’s sardonic gaze I met, and he lifted his brows at me quizzically before I looked away.

“I don’t know,” I said. I’d planned to oversee a clean-out of the root cellar. I realized even as I thought of this how much I would love to get out for a day. I imagined it would mean I’d finally have to listen to Aidan’s explanation, whatever it was, but that would surely be less awkward in the setting of a picnic with the children present. If the conversation strayed into areas I did not want to visit, I could always busy myself with fishing. “We’d need an escort.”

“I can spare both Aidan and Cathal to go with you,” Johnny put in.

This was beginning to look like a conspiracy. I eyed my cousin closely, but he was eating his porridge and appeared not to notice my suspicion.