‘I should not like to now. What could there be for me in the city, what might I gain from it, over there, all the way over there? I can’t see the point of it at all. I’m much better off here, I’ve everything I need here. There have been times, long gone now, when I thought I might like to see it, but not now, never now. I curse my former foolishness. Even I, Clodius, was young once. Does that sound strange to you?’

‘No, Granny, not at all.’

‘It sounds strange to me.’

Tic! Tic! Tic!

A knock on the door, Grandmother looked as if someone had shown her something very ugly, something lewd perhaps.

‘What now? Who is out there?’

‘It is Mrs Piggott, my lady,’ came the housekeeper’s voice from the corridor.

‘Piggott? Why, Piggott? What, Piggott?’

‘Might I come in?’

‘I am being visited by my grandson, Piggott. We are having such a merry time.’

‘Please, my lady,’ said Piggott, still corridor-side, ‘I should very much like to inform you of the news of the house.’

‘It is hardly the hour for my gazette.’

‘Circumstances, my lady, unforeseen circumstances.’

‘Oh, stop nibbling at the door, Piggott! Step in then, be present!’

The Piggott that appeared in the room in no way resembled the Piggott that I knew. This was no starched and ironed Piggott, this was a very rumpled one with smudges upon her, and most notably of all, a slight gash upon her forehead.

‘Piggott!’ struck Grandmother. ‘How dare you!’

‘I’m so sorry, my lady,’ she said, ‘but I felt that I must, I felt it my duty …’ She saw me then, and rather than giving me the usual bow, let out a small scream. ‘Master Clodius! You are here, are you! You yourself! My lady, oh my lady!’

‘Piggott,’ said Grandmother, ‘don’t be messy, it isn’t like you.’

‘No, my lady.’

‘Be a good woman.’

‘Yes, my lady.’

‘What is the passion for?’

Mrs Piggott, her hands fluttering about, playing the piano though there was no piano before them, was at my grandmother, upon her knees and delivering her information, sotto voce, to my elderly relative’s right pinna. There was only the quiet rustling of her whispering for a little while, I could not hear her above the racket of the timepieces, though occasionally Grandmother would comment.

‘I know the train is late, woman!’

More whispering.

‘I also know there is a Gathering!’

More whispering.

‘How large?’

More whispering.

‘It must be split up. Tell those gentlemen from the city that I shall have their bodies fractioned if they do not break up the Gathering instantly. I don’t want to hear about it any more. No excuses!’

Yet more.

‘Tummis?’

Yet more.

‘You are certain?’

Yet more.

‘On his own?’

Yet more.

‘In this?’

Yet more.

‘Oh, weak stuff! Un-Iremonger!’

Yet more.

‘And Iktor and Olish?’

Yet more.

‘They have it?’

Yet more.