‘Too right, Mum. You know, I told you it was a fundraising committee for the Green Party and, like, we were throwing around some ideas for making money and this one elderly idiot – I don’t know what his name is but he’s clearly got more money than sense – anyway, he suggests raising sponsorship for some trip he’s taking. OK, what kind of trip, we ask. And he only tells us that it’s some big rally – hundreds of SUVs driving from London to Saudi Arabia or somewhere. And he says he’s got lots of wealthy chums who’d sponsor him to complete the course and raise lots of the old mazuma. That’s what he actually said – “lots of the old mazuma”. Where did he get that from? And I say, “You do know who we’re trying to raise money for, don’t you?” And he says, “Yes. The Green Party.” And I say, “Duh. Don’t you see something kind of wrong about raising money to protect the environment by driving highly polluting vehicles for thousands of unnecessary miles?” And he just doesn’t get it. He gets all shirty and says, “I was only trying to help. I do have some very well-heeled friends who could do your cause a lot of good”, and he looks at me like I’ve just strangled his favourite puppy. What an idiot! I just cannot bloody believe it.’

‘They don’t understand people with principles, do they? And you’ve always had principles, haven’t you, Shannon?’ Rhona condescended to include Jude in the conversation. ‘Right from when she was a little girl, Shannon had principles, you know. It was about animals then. Shannon couldn’t bear to see an animal hurt. Could you, Shannon?’

Shannon agreed that she couldn’t.

‘Used to save up your pocket money to give to the RSPCA, didn’t you, love?’

Shannon agreed to this too.

‘And then, as she got older, Shannon realized that doing harm to animals was part of something much bigger, which was doing harm to the environment. And now she devotes a lot of time and energy to the Green Party. You do, don’t you?’

Shannon could not deny it.

‘Which obviously makes her domestic situation very difficult.’

‘Sorry? Why?’ If Jude was going to be part of the conversation, she might as well ask when she didn’t understand something.

‘Well, you see, her marriage …’

‘There’s nothing wrong with my marriage,’ said Shannon, in the weary tone of someone who has rehearsed these arguments many times before.

‘You say that … and you’re always very loyal to Billy … more loyal, to my mind than you need to be … but the fact remains that you’re now in an impossible moral situation.’

‘Mum, it isn’t a case of—’