The hand currently covered in Oscar’s blood because I still couldn’t control my damned temper. The hand I’d had on her an hour ago. I yanked it away so the blood couldn’t touch her, and she flinched.

Now I’d fucked that up, too.

I walked past her and chose the second door, the one that led to the back boardwalk instead of Main Street.

Crisp air hit my face, and I sucked it in, willing it to wash away the last ten minutes of my life. Hell, the last ten years.

“Cam,” Willow called softly as she shut the door behind her. “Are you okay?”

I scoffed, then laughed with sick sarcasm. “Am I okay?” I turned to face her. “I could have killed him without so much as breaking a sweat, Willow. I might have if you hadn’t been there.”

“But you didn’t.” She walked forward, and I backed away, shaking my head.

“Don’t.”

“You didn’t kill him. And he more than deserved getting punched in the face for what he said.” She wrapped her arms around her middle.

“You heard it.” Chalk another mark up on the things-I’ve-done-to-hurt-Willow board.

“He hit you with your worst fear, and I know how protective you are of me. Of course you’re going to hit him back.”

“Will you just stop?” I shouted.

She didn’t flinch or run, simply stood there and looked at me, accepting everything she shouldn’t.

“Stop defending me. Stop acting like the shit I’ve done is okay. Stop making excuses for me.”

“I love you.” Instead of running like any sane person would, she took a step forward.

“You shouldn’t! I just gave you another reason not to.” Because it didn’t matter that she was the very air in my lungs—at some point I was going to break her, despite my best intentions.

“But I do! I always have, and you know it. You can’t change my feelings because you’re uncomfortable. I’m not going to stand by and watch you self-destruct. I did it once, and I’ve never forgiven myself. Don’t ask me to do it again.” The wood beneath her feet creaked as she took another step toward me.

“Did it ever occur to you that I’m not capable of being saved? That ship sailed a decade ago. Hell, probably before then, if you ask my dad. Maybe you should listen to Oscar and go for Xander. He never makes a mistake. Never hurts someone he loves. I’ll inevitably ruin you. You get that, don’t you? What if the next time…God, what if I hurt you?”

“You won’t.” She still came forward.