Gray took a mouthful of beer.  “It’s up for sale.  One venture capitalist firm has already shown interest.  We haven’t discussed numbers yet but my accountant reckons I should be looking for about one point eight million.”

“This is a bit sudden.  What brought it on?” Jeff Campbell asked.

Gray took another long drink, keeping them all waiting.  He had known these men for many years and they had been through a lot together, yet he still felt uncomfortable opening up in front of them.  They had shared many things in their time, but rarely their emotions.

“I just can’t bear it without them,” he finally said, staring into his glass.  “If I stay around here it will drive me crazy, I know it.  When Dina and Danny were both alive I would think about them on the drive home, and every time I opened the door he would run to me shouting ‘Daddy!’  Now, when I open the door, there’s just silence, and it tears me apart.”

His eyes began to cloud and he wiped them before finishing off his beer.  As he put his empty glass on the table it was immediately replaced with a fresh pint.

“Whenever I pass his nursery, I think of him.  When I go to the supermarket I remember the times we used to go as a family, and I even sleep on the couch because I can’t stand to be alone in our bed. When I see a woman and kid in the street, it reminds me of them.

“There are just too many things in my daily routine that make me think about my family.  I need a fresh start, get out of the area and throw myself into something that will take up every waking moment.  The only thing I know that intense is a stint in Iraq.”

“But why sell up?” Colin Avery asked.  “Couldn’t you just get a manager in for a while?”

“I could,” Gray admitted, “but I want a clean slate.  I don’t want to come back to the old routine; it’ll just bring back the memories.  This way, once I’m done in Iraq, I can settle anywhere I like.”  A few nods told him that they thought his plan made sense.

A couple of them asked about positions in the upcoming contract and he began taking the names, but was interrupted when his mobile rang.  The display told him it was his solicitor, so he made his excuses and moved to a quieter area of the room.  He listened for a few moments, then suddenly exploded into the phone:  “You’re fucking joking!”

Everyone at the table looked at him, their eyes asking what the problem was.  Gray listened for another minute or so before ending the call and resuming his seat at the table.