There was a type of painful pleasure to it. Painful because of his fingers digging into the ultra-tight parts of my body, but also pleasure when he released his grip, endorphins rushing in as the oxygen-starved muscle finally was let loose.

I let myself relax muscles I hadn’t even known I’d been clenching. The smooth rhythm of his fingers across my scalp sent a shiver through me. Intimate. My eyes became half-lidded as I tried not to fall asleep while Soren worked on me.

He only stopped when his hands started to burn.

Erlking and the stag we might’ve been, but the ancient rules of power still applied. Goblins risked burning themselves if they did deeds that were in no way related to hunting or battle; which was a shame because whatever Soren did to my neck and shoulders made them feel like melted butter.

He must’ve picked up on that. “Don’t worry about the burns, Janneke. It’s worth it to see you relax. You carry so much tension. And I promise I’ll stop if I hit first-degree wounds.”

I gave him a withering look as he rubbed his hands, already red from what he’d done so far. “I’m not going to lie. I really liked that. But don’t injure yourself for my sake.”

“It hurts you more than it hurts me.” Soren shrugged as his hands turned back to a normal—or normal-for-him—color.

Moonlight covered our room in a blanket of silver, and both Soren and I sighed, wishing for the moment to never end. Despite his calm demeanor, his heart thumped fast in his chest. My loosened muscles already were tightening again.

The closer and closer we came to getting ready, the closer we came to midnight, the closer we came to the portal, meant the closer we’d come to Hel and Lydian. Nerves fluttered in my stomach like moths.

THE MOON WAS high in the sky as we entered the courtyard. I clenched Soren’s hand, careful to not put too much pressure on the areas where there might be burns. But I needed his reassuring touch right now. With what we had to do, I didn’t think I’d be able to go on without it. It was amazing my spine hadn’t turned to butter and melted. Without the nature of the stag taking over part of my brain, I was still left with my human emotions.

Other than us, only Diaval was out. She sat in the center of an elaborate circle drawn from chalk. While I could recognize some of the runes—Hagalaz, Raidho, Jera—there were multiple markings that I couldn’t recognize. The she-goblin had her eyes closed and was muttering quietly to herself, but stopped as Soren stepped forward.