‘You don’t know much about genies, do you, Uh Integrity? I’m yours until you take the wishes. You can give me away, hide me in a drawer, drop me in the ocean if you like. I’ll still come back to you.’ He gave me jazz hands. Actual jazz hands. ‘It’s magic!’

I stared down at him. ‘That can’t be right.’

‘It is! Try it. Go on. Try it.’ He craned his neck upwards, glee in his eyes. ‘We’re in the ladies room? Please try it, Uh Integrity! Leave me here! I love being in the ladies room!’

‘You’re disgusting.’

He beamed at me. ‘Thanks.’

‘What happened to your begging me on hands and knees to keep you around?’

He gave an indolent shrug. ‘Twenty-four hour cooling-off period.’

‘What?’

‘You get twenty-four hours after picking me up to change your mind. That passed, oooh, about thirty minutes ago.’

I gritted my teeth. I should have dumped him the second I realised what he was.

‘In my experience,’ Bob continued, ‘this generally goes better when the owner thinks they’re in control and making all the decisions. I like you though. I can tell you’re a bit different.’ He winked as if he were paying me a wonderful compliment. Or softening the blow. ‘Now tell me, who are you trying to impress? I can help. I’m good at true love wishes. Sometimes. Okay, almost never. But I can still help. Who’s the lucky guy?’

‘Never you mind,’ I told him as the door opened and one of the Sidhe girls strolled in. She gave me a funny look; she probably thought I was holding a conversation with myself. There certainly wasn’t a trace of fear in her expression so she didn’t recognise me. It was a relief to know that my face wasn’t plastered on Wanted posters all over the Clanlands.

I snapped the bag shut and firmly zipped it. There was a muffled squawk of irritation from Bob, which I covered with a cough. I gave her an airy smile.

‘I was drinking a glass of champagne,’ I told her, ‘when I heard someone say hello. Then I realised it had to be the drink talking.’

Her mouth fell open slightly as my feeble joke sailed right over her head. She looked me up and down and edged away. ‘Are you from Macquarrie Clan?’

‘No. Why do you ask?’

She shook her head. ‘No reason.’ She backed quickly into one of the stalls and firmly closed the door. I shrugged and walked back out. There will always be haters.