“They’ll make me into a monster,” I said quietly. “Sooner or later.”

She wouldn’t look at me.

“I can’t let that happen,” I said. “For all I know, I could turn into something that would hurt Maggie myself. But maybe I can use them to get her out of danger.”

She inhaled sharply and looked up at me.

“It’s got to be Mab,” I said. “She’s wicked smart, but she isn’t omniscient or infallible. I’ve swindled faeries before. I can do it again.”

She inhaled sharply. “You’re going to be the Winter Knight?” She shook her head. “What if she doesn’t? I mean, what if she won’t?”

I let out a low chuckle. “Oh, she’ll do it. If I go to her, she’ll do it. She’s been after me long enough.”

“I don’t understand,” Molly said. “She’ll… she’ll twist you. Change you. It’s what they do.”

I fumbled and put one of my hands on hers. “Molls… Whatever happens… I’m not going to make it out of this one.”

She stared at me for a minute. Then she shook her head. She shook her head and silent tears fell from her eyes.

“Molly,” I said again, patting her hand. “Kid… For everything there is a season.”

“Don’t,” she said. “Don’t you dare quote the Bible at me. Not to justify this.”

“Bible?” I said. “I was quoting the Byrds.”

She burst out in a huffing sound that was both a laugh and sob.

“Look, Molls. Nothing lasts forever. Nothing. And if I’ve got to choose between myself and my daughter? That’s not even a choice. You know that.”

She bowed her head and wept harder. But I saw her nod. Just a little.

“I need your help,” I said.

She looked up at me, bloodshot eyes a mess.

“I’m going to arrange things. But Mab’s going to be wary of me. She knows my history, and if I know what’s going on, she’ll be able to tell I’m lying to her. I don’t have enough of a poker face for that.”

“No,” Molly said, sniffing and briskly swiping at her eyes. “You don’t. You still suck at lying, boss.”

“To the people who know me, maybe,” I said, smiling. “Do you understand what I’m asking you to do?”

She bit her lip and said, “Do you? Have you thought what it’s going to mean for me once… once you’re…”

“Dead,” I said quietly. “I think Ebenezar or Injun Joe will take over for me, continue your training. They both know how strongly I felt about sheltering you from the Council’s judgment.”

She looked suddenly exhausted. She shook her head slightly. “That’s not what I meant.”

“Oh,” I said.

Molly had crushed on me since she was a teenager. I hadn’t really thought anything of it. I mean, it had been going on for years and…

… and crushes probably didn’t last for years. Did they? They faded. Molly’s feelings hadn’t, but I didn’t reciprocate them. I loved her to pieces, but I was never going to be in love with her.