“Yes, a futile act that humans practice to ensure some sense of power over the elements. Cleaning is an extreme delusion. You sweep the floor, and then you throw the dust ball and bread-bag plastic cinch into the trash, and the trash goes to the landfill, as we all know, and the landfill will never be cleaned unless scientists release plastic-metabolizing microbes, which will surely get out of the landfill and come back to eat our flesh. More often than not, cleaning makes things dirtier. Bleach, antibacterial soap, idiots who throw their compost into plastic bags . . . By trying to eliminate ninety-nine percent of germs, we’re adding in toxicity.” She finished the diatribe.

Copious coffins of cuttlefish! Now my new trans companions were really going to know how weird things got around here.

“I hear ya! It’s just that I’m super anal and I’m going to have a panic attack if I have to use the bathroom near those . . . containers,” Aiden said, trying to keep his tone low-key, as recommended by psychologists when confronting others about their disgusting lifestyle habits.

“Woosh, weesh, wash,” the Witch said, with a flick of her hands, and removed herself from the doorway.

I gave Aiden a look, trying to remind him that the Witch had great hexing powers.

“I’m sorry, I have to clean it. Do you have rubber gloves?” Aiden asked.

“Under the kitchen sink.”

As Aiden cleaned, I cooked us eggs and toasted English muffins and the Witch walked by and sprinkled chervil on the plates when my back was turned. Breakfast for dinner was the ultimate comfort in a world that had turned upside-down more than once.

We ate quietly, and then I set Blithe up on the couch with my special gravity blanket and inflated Aiden’s air mattress. It was almost like summer camp, except for Blithe’s suffering.

I went into my room, and on my linen duvet cover I found a pastel purple zine stapled twice across its thin spine.

How to Guide a Loved One Through the Shadowlands: Emotions

When you love someone, you will want to pull them out of the Shadowlands, to rescue them from the terror. And if you love someone, you will let them stay. You will keep your gaze steady; you will hold out a bucket for their despair without dunking your head into it.

The words were so true that I could read only a page at a time. I rationed it.

In the middle of the night, I went to pee. My slippers did not stick on the bathroom floor, the sink had been wiped down, and the air smelled of lavender.