Wait, had she missed one? Maybe when Lincoln had that upper respiratory infection? His little nose had been running nonstop and his barking cough was painful just to listen to. She’d crawled into bed with him a few nights, holding him close and stroking his back, doing whatever she could to help him sleep away the sickness.

Come to think of it, maybe she’d missed two pills.

So that was the punishment for missing two pills then—two pink lines.

Two children.

She tapped her bare foot against the black-and-white floor tiles. She hadn’t had a pedicure since last summer, and you could tell. How was a woman who couldn’t take care of her own two feet supposed to raise two whole children?

When Sadie got pregnant with Lincoln, it was also a surprise. She’d been pitching a design concept for a hybrid floral and dessert shop when the first wave of nausea hit. Her mentor, Erin Bellman, had held the trash can for her while she puked.

“Too much fun last night?” Erin murmured, eyebrows raised.

Sadie paled. “We stayed in and watched a movie. I must have a bug.”

Erin sent her home and when Sadie stopped at the pharmacy for Sprite and saltines, she hastily grabbed a pregnancy test, as well.

Those two lines, the ones from two years ago, were somehow not as scary as these.

How ridiculous is that?

She and Ethan weren’t married then. In fact, they’d only been dating for six months. Six months! They’d been still very much in the honeymoon phase.

“I don’t want you to freak out,” she’d told him calmly, pushing the positive pregnancy test across her coffee table. “I’m pregnant. We’re pregnant. But I can handle this.”

She had a good job at Urban Design Studios, a job she was lucky enough to love. While no Suze Orman, she was (mostly) practical with her money. And with twelve weeks of fully paid maternity leave and coworkers happy to share nanny recommendations, Sadie felt as prepared as she’d ever be.

Little did she know parenthood would be like jumping out of a plane without a parachute, occasionally exhilarating, and always terrifying.

Ethan had reacted well, though. Sadie had braced herself for the worst and had instead gotten the best. Ethan had engulfed her in his arms and held her tight. “I love you,” he’d whispered. “We’ll make this work together.”

And true to his word, Ethan had proposed there in her studio apartment the very next evening, presenting her with a diamond engagement ring stunning in its simplicity.

What was Ethan going to say to this news? Would he be excited? Scared? Worried? Hell, maybe she’d get a pair of diamond studs this go-around.

Sadie giggled, half delirious.

Just when she had hoped to soon see the light at the end of the toddler tunnel, she would be plunged back into darkness. Middle of the night feedings? Colic? Endless diapers? Of course she knew all the perks of parenting, but right now that joy seemed out of reach.