my heart’s come back to me

across the sad and lonesome years

my heart’s come back to me

darling can you see through the tears

my heart and I

returned

my heart and I

and the audience is beating, audience is pumping blood, this blood that words, inside of us. Can’t you feel it rising? Can’t you feel it surging and rising and passing through? It’s so powerful, this sharing of blood. Aren’t you crying?

*

Afterward we go backstage and your man Del Brogan has a gaggle of women around him. Eden is sitting on a stool on her own sucking a lollipop. Fuck me, but that’s a bit suggestive, is it not? Barney says to me, and he winks. You’ve got blow jobs on the brain, I says to him. Everyone in Ireland has blow jobs on the brain, he says. Doesn’t Wee Robin suck your cock with her outfit on? I says to him. He shakes his head. She says it’s disgusting, he says. Nightmare, I says to him. I bet your man Del Brogan is getting his cock sucked every night of the week, I says. We look over and your man Del Brogan is sitting on the edge of a table talking to this gorgeous blonde number. Speaking of which, Barney says, did you crack one off in the toilet? He points to the stain on my crotch. I had a fucking accident, I says to him, that’s all. Do I look weird to you? I says to him. No more than usual, he says. Then your man Del Brogan catches sight of us and waves us over. Fuck me, he says, it’s my two favourite stalkers. Are youse looking for autographs, boys?

How’s the groupie situation? Barney says to him. Banging, he says. Banging. Better than ever, he says. When Tommy was around I had serious competition. But now I’ve got the run of the field. I’m getting my cock sucked every night of the week, lads, he says to us. No word of a lie. Fuck me, I says to him, I was just saying that there’s a fucking drought on blow jobs in Ireland, always has been. When Saint Patrick ran all the snakes out of Ireland he must have fucking ran all the blow jobs out too, your man Del Brogan says. But they’re coming back, he says. Mark my words, they are coming back. For a second I’m caught there, speechless. Can he see me, I’m wondering, the way I saw him? What’s coming back, I says to him, the snakes? The fucking blow jobs, you divot, he says to me. The fucking blow jobs are coming back. The fuck you think I’m talking about? Then he winks at me. He fucking knows, I’m telling myself, he fucking knows. The snake means you’re marked. The snake means knowledge of the future. But then the blonde comes over and puts her arm around his waist. These are my good friends Barney and Sammy, he says to her. This is Babs. Babs gives us both a really limp handshake and then puts her mouth up to his ear. I hear her whispering to him. When are we getting out of here, Daddy? she says. She’s calling him Daddy. Daddy’s little girl.