Dedication

For all the dark swans

FOREWORD

“Love me like my demons do.”

-Akif Kichloo:

INTRODUCTION

This is a dark romance. A one-night, terrifyingly indulgent fantasy for readers who like to dabble in reading the darker corners of literature.

I obviously do not condone, or endorse the things that happen in these pages. It is a work of FICTION. You ask, and I deliver. So make sure to let me know what you want to read next!

I will not be putting a long list of triggers due to this being a dark book so it goes without saying, proceed with caution.

I. Club

PART 1

CLUB

Tonight, things are going to change. I’m going to dance into Altitude, grab the nearest hottest guy I can find and stick my tongue down his throat just for spite.

Maybe I’ll even get Jade to snap a few pictures for Instagram.

Tonight, I’m going to be anyone besides myself.

In my true reality, I’m a twenty-five-year-old lawyer, spending sunny days in courtrooms and starry nights tucked inside the comfort of my king-sized bed.

I rarely, no scratch that. I never let loose.

Since graduating, I’ve spent the better half of my twenties climbing the corporate ladder and shelling out every ounce of my energy into a relationship that didn’t fucking matter.

“You’re going to make him so jealous!” My best friend Jade sings, swiping on the last wisps of thick black mascara over my lashes.

I look at my reflection. A smokey shadow with a glimmer of shine on the inner lid. “We have to post a million pictures.” I grin mischievously, attempting to let a fake grin blanket my sadness.

Jade agrees, nodding. “We’re going to make Dante regret the day he left you.”

Which was last night.

I walked in from work, excited to tell him about a new high-profile case. I searched everywhere, but he was nowhere to be found.

I thought something had happened, until I found a bright pink post-it on my pillow that read ‘Sorry, Mace’ along with my keys scattered on the silk sheets. If I hear anyone call me Mace again, I’m going to gouge their eyes out.

“I just don’t get it,” I dig my teeth into a twizzler, “three years for what? He just took his shit and walked out.”

Jade shrugs, ever the bachelorette. “You know my opinion, no one should ev-”

I cut her off, finishing her mantra. “Be stuck with one cock in their twenties.” I roll my eyes. “But you know that doesn’t apply to me.”

She pats my cheek, “Yes, Mother Theresa.” She teases.

I clench my fist, “He could have just talked to me if it was that.” Which we both know it was, it’s just something I won’t dare say.

Upon further investigation, meaning Jade being a CIA agent and searching the dark corners of the internet for the answers that Dante didn’t bother to give me, she found the culprit. A skinny, bleach blonde model. A socialite in our area of Los Angeles.

She’s twenty-one, not much younger than me but still, Dante is thirty-five. A high-profile investment banker in the city. He was the perfect catch, so I thought.

But maybe whenever someone hits a certain point in their age bracket, he has to trade them in for a newer model. Did I mention today’s my Twenty-Sixth birthday?

Happy fucking birthday to me.

The thought of them together drives me insane, I did everything for him. He told me when I mentioned my virginity, that he was okay with it. He thought it was sweet that I was saving myself for someone special.

Meanwhile, he was screwing the model behind my back. Funny thing is, we were leaving for Hawaii tomorrow and the tickets are in my name… so I’ll be bringing Jade instead. But that trip, it was the one.

I had this whole plan, to open the windows and let the ocean breeze blanket us as I lost my virginity to him.

We had done everything else, minus him going down on me. He said it was gross, but I was growing so much more comfortable with him, exploring my body. One time, I even wanted him to choke me like I saw on a random porn search. But he wouldn’t, maybe vanilla is what I needed.

But who knows now.

Sex, everything boils down to it.

It's not like I don’t want to, it’s just that I’ve waited all through high school while all my friends lost theirs. Then, during college I was too busy with my books rather than boys.

It simply just never happened, so when it came time to have the opportunity, I can’t really explain what I was waiting for. Maybe it was fear, maybe not…

And the books I read… wow they’re morbid for someone who’s never had sex.

But tonight, I’m going to pretend I’m anyone else.

Taking a page from the books I read and jumping into a sexy dress to fit the character.

I’m going to stroll into that club and let loose.

I have one mission tonight, to lose the thing I’ve held onto for so long.

My virginity.

Fuck a few posts of me kissing a guy, losing my virginity to some random in a club will be me taking back control of my life. I’ll never allow another guy to walk all over me again. “What kind of guy do you want tonight?” Jade asks.

I think for a moment, “What do you mean?”

“Short, tall, covered in tattoos?”

Oh. “Honestly, don’t care. As long as he’s hot, I’m craving the attention. Anything to make me feel like less of a second choice.” The pain has worn me thin, like a piece of brittle that’s waiting to crack at the slightest pressure. Luckily, I have Jade. I can be completely honest with her. We’ve been best friends since high school, and while she’s wild, she never judged me. She taught me things that I should have learned through other experiences I was too scared to go through with.

Spin the bottle? She was my first kiss.

Seven minutes in heaven? My first crush, Mark, was chosen to go in with Jade and she saw how upset I was, so instead of going in with him, she took me. We didn’t care who thought what, we were just inseparable.

Without her, I wouldn’t have discovered the world of toys, which as a virgin, changed my life. She taught me how to touch myself, how to feel my body and I’ll forever be grateful to her for that.

“Hot.” She takes her finger through the air, making a checkmark. “I’m looking for hot too.” She laughs, “Really anything with a nice, hard cock.”

I playfully slap her arm, “Jesus, Jade.”

“Jesus won’t have any part of what’s going down in this club tonight. Come on!”

I can’t help but tug at the too short black dress, this thing doesn’t want to cooperate with my wide hips. “My ass will be on show.” I snort, contemplating slipping on a pair of tights.

Jade’s gaze follows my line of sight, “No, take your eyes off of that drawer right this instant, Macey!”

“Ugh,” I huff, peeling my body away from my dresser. “Okay. Let’s go before I change my mind.”

She laughs, picking up her purse. “Understood.”

We take our four minutes’ walk down the city streets before making it in front of the neon lit club.

* * *

Okay, okay. Breathe in, breathe out. It’s just a nightclub, full of horny, drunk people.

Exactly what I’m looking for, so why am I so scared to go in?

We walk through the doors of Altitude, and a burning sensation creeps up my spine, I’m being watched. My eyes dart across the fog-filled area, streaks of pink and blue clouds make it seem like we’re in Heaven more than a nightclub and I find the source of the unusual feeling, men. So many men. Hot, tall, black suit wearing men. It’s beautiful in here, a place where you go to have the time of your life.

The shadows and the laser lights that beam across my body make me feel like I’m on a stage. “It’s loud!” I shout to Jade.

She tugs me towards the bar. “Duh, it’s a club.” She sings, leaning across the wooden top and pressing her body down to push her tits out to get the bartenders attention. I come here often, but something about tonight…

There’s just something about tonight that feels different.

The lean bartender bypasses people that were here before us, showcasing Jade’s true talents. She calls herself a siren, but instead of luring men with her voice, she uses her body. “Hey, ladies.” The man grins at Jade, not taking his attention off of her.

She doesn’t pay him the same energy, she crooks her finger and slides it under my chin. “Shots?” She mouths.

I nod in her hands. “Definitely.”

“Coming right up.”

We down the two clear liquid shots of what taste like poison. “Martinis?” I suggest, wanting something a little tastier.

She sucks in a deep breath. “Fuck yes.”

I order a dry olive, and she orders orange. With our dainty drinks in hand, we carefully pass-through groups of people looking for somewhere to ‘Search’ as Jade puts it. “Over there.” Her eyes twinkle to the VIP booths.

To where the high rollers party, and I worry Dante is going to appear with his new arm candy tonight. Altitude is one of the nicest clubs in LA. Huge stages, state of the art lighting, the best drinks in the city. Jade’s gentle fingertips scorch my burning skin, “Calm down, he won’t come.” She assures.

“How do you know?”

She shrugs, “If he does, I’ll fuck him up.” She grins, her face so close to mine that I can smell her cotton candy breath.

“Promise?”

She nods, grabbing my hand to twirl me to the music. “Yes, now let’s get you laid!”

“Shh!” I shush her, unable to handle her outlandish mouth. The way she says what’s on her mind, at the worst possible times. We move onto the dance floor, hugging the edge so we can move to the music without getting the drinks knocked out of our hands.

I’m already a little tipsy, dropping the olive onto my tongue from the empty martini glass. That’s when I notice a tall, tan drink of water watching me. “Jade.” I whisper in her ear as she dances on me.

“Huh?”

I nudge her. “Three o’ clock.”

“Oh,” she coos. “Jason Mamoa type.”

He isn’t a drink of water, he’s a stout glass of vintage whiskey.

And I’m in the mood to burn tonight.

I continue dancing to the music, letting the alcohol control my body and ever so often, I’ll make burning eye contact with the behemoth of a man. Tonight, I’m going to be less like Macey and more like Jade. “Exactly my thoughts.”

“Well,” She grabs my hand, “no reason to waste any time. Let’s go see him.”

I still, a thousand thoughts dancing through my mind. The fear and resentment of being cheated on seep into my conscious, reminding me how I was nothing to Dante, how I was just used by him and then thrown away like trash. What if this guy was looking at Jade? How will I compe-

“Hey there, gorgeous.” The man is here, right in front of me, a leather jacket hugging his muscular arms. A long, jagged scar rest on his cheek, making him look rugged but no less handsome. This man is what I imagine the Greek Gods looked like when they roamed the earth.

I have to look up to meet his deep jade eyes, a tinge of ocean turquoise rings his irises. “Hi.” Is all I can manage to respond. He’s looking at me, so close I can smell the earthy cologne that laces his tan skin. This is probably the tallest, biggest guy I’ve ever encountered, and he’s come to me.

Not Jade.

Not the girls twerking behind me.

But me.

Jade gives me a triumphant ass slap before touting her way back to her bartender, “I’ll grab you a drink.” She winks.

The man pulls out his billfold before she gets too far, “Here.” He hands her a few hundred-dollar bills. “It’s on me.”

“Patron!” She dances.

I smile up at him, “Thank you.”

“What’s your name?” He asks, leaning his tall body against a support beam.

“Macey.” I try to make my voice sound sultry, but it’s too quiet in this crowded club.

He leans in closer to hear me better, “Mace?”

The moment the words leave his lips, I want to slap him. But it isn’t his fault my shitty boyfriend cheated on me. “Macey.” I correct, standing on my tiptoes to reach him.

He’s about six-foot-three, covered in tattoos. The muscles in his arms strain against his midnight-black worn-out leather jacket, with the symbol of a snake on the left shoulder. Motorcycle gang maybe? I’m looking to lose myself tonight, not get involved with anything dangerous. But he looks so sweet, with long hair pulled into a bun, a dimpled grin. Soft yet hard eyes.

His hand comes up to move a stray piece of hair behind my ear, confident. “Do you and your friend want to come party with us?” He nudges his head back, to where four other guys sit at a VIP booth. A crystal decanter of whiskey sits on the rectangular glass table in front of the couch while sexy bottle girls surround them.

I tilt my head, wondering how good these men would look in a photo to make Dante jealous. Me, sitting in the middle of the five of them, drunk and wild and free. “What’s your name?”

“Kane.” He responds, his tone low and bold.

I see Jade walking back, giving me a ‘Yes, you go girl’ look and before I can think too much about it, I lean into Kane. “We’d love to join you.”

We wait for Jade to return with the Pineapple passion drinks; she’s already stumbling from the shots and martini. I can’t blame her; my feet feel light as well.

I allow them to float me to the group of men, but it isn’t hard to keep a steady stance while Kane’s strong body is right beside me.

The black leather couch is dimly lit by the surrounding lights. It’s not tucked away from the party, it’s the center of it. Those beautiful clouds of pink and blue smoke are all around, an ethereal look.

The dance floor to my left, a line of drinks to the right, and the four hulking men that Kane is introducing us to.

“Ladies,” Kane nods, “Your friends name?” He asks me quietly.

“Jade.”

He nods his head, “Guys, Mace and Jade.” There he goes again, calling me Mace. I’ll correct him later.

“Ladies, this is Taker.” He points to a tall, less muscular man. Full scruff, and hard edges. The kind of guy your mother warns you about, but come to think of it, all the men in this VIP booth are men you would never bring home to meet your parents.

But they are just the type of guys you can have a wild night with in a club.

He gestures to the man beside Taker, “Choke.” A tattoo of an inky snake wraps sinisterly around his neck, choking him out. Black hair that reaches his ears match the obsidian shade of his eyes.

I wave politely, growing a little nervous by the violent names. I wonder why Kane is simply, Kane. “Daze.” He nods his head to the least violent looking one of the group, and I assume his name is Daze because he smokes weed, considering he’s puffing on a joint in the middle of the club. Daze nods, a crooked smile lying on his face and dirty blonde hair that dances right above his brow line.

“And lastly,” Kane nods, “Blade.” Now Blade looks sinister, not in a creepy way, but in a he kills people for a living way. Still hot, no doubt. Long legs stretched out in front of him, a permanent scowl on his chiseled face.

What in the fuck am I doing? I look to Jade, who loves adventure, and try to mimic her behavior. She’s already flirting with Blade, of course going to the scariest looking one and sitting on his lap. She’s fearless, everything I need to be tonight.

“Come here often?” I ask as Kane takes my hand, then I internally cringe from the cliché question.

He sits down, pulling me beside him and immediately throws his arm behind my shoulders to pull me in close. His body is warm and inviting, large and strong, hard like marble. Whenever I would come here with Dante it was all business, him meeting my clients and celebrations after a win in the courtroom. It was never this flirtatious, this fun, and the night has only just begun. “Every Saturday night.” He whispers in my ear like an invitation.

Kane snaps his fingers when my drink is close to empty, that’s the dangerous thing about the pineapple passions, they taste like juice, and you get wasted on them very quickly. His large hand goes to my thigh just as quickly as the second drink hits my soul.

I try to sit with better posture, attempting to not twiddle my thumbs. “Why is your name Kane but your friends have nicknames?”

“I’m their leader, so I have the respect of my real name.”

I nod, my eyes widening. “Leader?”

He shuts me up with the move of his hand going a little higher on my thigh. “Let me know if you need anything.” He tells me.

A kiss, a picture of that kiss, to post on social media to make my ex jealous. That’s what I want to say, but I refrain. “How is it that you’re here alone?” he asks.

I think twice about spilling my emotions all over the place, but honestly it would be nice to have a listening ear. “Well, it’s my birthday.”

Kane snaps his fingers, summoning the girls over. “We’ve got a birthday girl.” He tells them, they grin and then disappear into the crowd. In a swift movement, Kane throws me to a sitting position on his left shoulder. “Birthday!” He shouts, and everyone in earshot cheers.

“She’s Twenty-Six now!” Jade dances.

My cheeks redden from embarrassment, but it is sweet. He only sets me down once the girls return, bubbly bottles of champagne in their hands with sparklers flicking light everywhere.

They drunkenly sing, and I lean into Kane, giggling and getting more comfortable as the night goes on. The guys cutting jokes at the expense of one another, and generally making me and Jade extremely comfortable in their presence. I mean, they’re the biggest guys here so they’re probably the safest to be with on a night out in the city.

“So, what were you saying before I threw you a little birthday bash?” he smiles, it’s crooked and genuine.

I shrug, frowning. “My boyfriend, he left me for another girl.”

“I’ll fuck him up for you.” Kane offers, sounding like Jade. He runs his knuckles across my arm, and chills shoot through every inch of my exposed skin, betraying me, and showing him just how much the simple touch has affected me. Something about the way he said it, the simple way he wanted to protect me. It makes me shiver in delight.

Jade leaves, going back and forth to her bartender every so often. I thought she was hitting it off with Blade, but Jade has a way of picking unavailable men, men like the guy pouring drinks who can’t leave right now. He’s a challenge to her, and before the night is over, she’ll have him wrapped around her finger.

She’ll sing her siren song and shake her perfectly round ass near his bar top and he’ll have no choice but to follow her. His job be damned, she’ll have him in a closed off part of the club, all to herself before the night is over.

I look down at Kane’s tattoos, the way his hand is so large it covers my thick thighs. He sees me noticing and gives a gentle squeeze, the action making me bite my lip. “What do you do?” I ask him, trying to decide if this is a good idea.

Maybe I shouldn’t be looking to lose my virginity tonight, maybe I’ll just kiss him. I can’t imagine what his… I look down trying to imagine how large he is. He would surely rip me in two. “My eyes are up here, sweetheart.” He teases. “And I do this and that.” He replies coolly. “I’m not going to ask you the same question, I care less about what you do for work, and more about what you’re wanting done to you tonight.” He breathes, the burn of whiskey from his breath is cooling against my heated skin.

His fingertips rise a little higher on my bare thigh, landing just below the curl of my too-short dress. “Umm…” I blush, the alcohol making me dizzy. “Do you want to dance?”

He nods, standing and towering over everyone as he extends his hand down to help me up. The music sounds even better with the power of liquor running through my veins, Jade knows we’re going to dance, and she sweeps her eyes across the line up of men on the couch. But there are too many to choose from, and why pick one when you could have them all.

We slide onto the dance floor, two girls and five giant men. People move out of our way and as the music pumps through our veins, we dance. Jade taking turns rubbing her ass on each of the guys. All except one.

The Story Continues on BooksBarbecue!

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