Gloria breathed a sigh of relief. Harper wouldn’t be leaving Saturday. She wouldn’t be leaving ever if everything went according to plan.

“Listen, when I do tell you where I am, do you promise not to let anyone know?” Harper asked.

“Anyone meaning Luke?” Aldo crossed his arms.

Harper shook her head. “No. Just anyone who doesn’t need to know. Like if a stranger asks you…or something.” She was fumbling this, making a mess.

“Are you in trouble?” Gloria asked. She knew exactly what kind of trouble Harper had been in. The man who had abused her and countless other children in foster care had gone to prison thanks in large part to Harper. He’d been sending her threatening letters and had escalated things by tasking Glenn with the job of killing Harper. It still made Gloria shake when she thought about how their monsters had overlapped.

But Luke had fixed it. There would be no parole for Harper’s monster. And obviously she didn’t know that yet.

Oh, hell. Things were going to get messy if Luke didn’t make his move.

“Everything’s fine. I just wanted to tell you both personally. You’ve been such good friends to me. I’m really going to miss you.” Harper’s voice cracked. “I love you guys so much.”

Gloria wrapped Harper into a hug again. “I wish I could talk you into staying.”

“Is there room for me in there?” Aldo grabbed them both and squeezed.

“One joke about a threesome, and I’ll smack you with that spatula,” Harper threatened.

Gloria giggled. “Promise me you won’t give up on love.”

“I promise,” Harper nodded. Gloria recognized the lie. Her friend had already given up, and it hurt Gloria’s heart. But soon, everything would be perfect.

When Harper left, Gloria looked at Aldo.

“She has no idea, does she?” Aldo asked gleefully.

“That Luke made sure her evil shadow will never get out of prison? That he’s planning the biggest, craziest grand gesture to win her back? That you spent nine hours yesterday helping Luke decorate the house for Christmas? Nope. No clue.” Gloria grinned.

She went to him and wrapped her arms around his neck, and together they laughed diabolically.

Ivan raced by and dove head first into an open moving box.

* * *

“I didn’t know until right this second that I had a thing for Cher,” Aldo whispered into Gloria’s ear, his fingers stroking through her long, black wig.

“And I didn’t realize how sexy you could make a ridiculous mustache look,” Gloria said, pushing on the fur lining Aldo’s upper lip. He also made tie-dye look pretty damn hot, too. Of course, Gloria had given the t-shirt a little extra Sonny Bono by cutting a deep, 70s-style V in it. Her own matching tie-dye was knotted sassily on her hip.

She tossed her long, fake hair over her shoulder.