Ryan chose Injun Joe's Chili joint for dinner. I chose The Misty Mountain Cafe, featuring nouvele cuisine and spectacular views of Balsam Mountain and Maggie Valey. When reasonable discussion failed to resolve the impasse, we flipped a coin.

The Misty Mountain looked more like a ski lodge than a cafe, built of logs, with high ceilings, fireplaces, and lots of glass. Upon our arrival we were informed that a table would be available in ninety minutes, but wine could be served on the patio immediately.

Joe seated us without delay. Even when I win, I lose.

One look told me le joint catered to a different market than le cafe. A half dozen TVs broadcast a colege footbal game, and men in dozer caps lined the bar. Couples and groups occupied tables and booths, denimed and booted, most looking like a haircut or shave had not played a part in their recent past. Mixed into the crowd were tourists in brightly colored windbreakers, and a few faces I recognized from the investigation.

Two men worked the bar, puling taps, scooping ice, and pouring liquor from bottles in front of a dingy mirror. Each had pasty skin and lank brown hair tied in a ponytail and secured with a bandanna. Neither looked Injun, and neither shopped at Armani. One wore a T-shirt plugging Johnson's Brown Ale, the other a group caled Bitchin' Tits.

On a platform in back, across from a pool table and pinbal machines, members of a band adjusted equipment, directed by a woman in black leather pants and Cruela makeup. Every few seconds we'd hear the amplified tap of her finger, then a count from one to four. Her sound tests barely overrode the TV play-by-play and the clicks and dings of the pinbal machines.

Nevertheless, the band looked like it had enough acoustic power to reach Buenos Aires. I suggested we order.

Ryan scanned the room and made a hand gesture. A woman, maybe forty or so, with overmoussed hair and an out-of-season tan, appeared at our table. A plastic badge gave her name as Tammi. With an i.

'Whatilitbe?' Tammi poised pencil over pad.

'May I have a menu?' I asked.

Tammi sighed, retrieved two menus from the bar, and slapped them on the table. Then she looked at me with forbidding patience.

Click. Click. Click. Ding. Ding. Ding. Ding.

My decision did not take long. Injun Joe offered nine types of chili, four burgers, a hot dog, and mountain meat loaf.

I requested the Climbingbear Burger and a Diet Coke.

'I've heard you make kiler chili here.' Ryan showed Tammi a lot of teeth.

'Best in the west.' Tammi showed Ryan even more.

Tap. Tap. Tap. Tap. One. Two. Three. Four.

'It must be hard to wait on so many people at the same time. I don't know how you do it.'

'Personal charm.' Tammi tilted her chin and threw out one hip.

'How's the Walkingstick Chili?'