She tensed. “There’s plenty of time.” She didn’t tell him she was thinking of not going. She didn’t want to leave the family. “Can we talk about it another time?”

“Sure.” He hesitated. “It’s what your mom would have wanted.”

People didn’t always get what they wanted, did they? Except that, ironically, her mother usually had. Except for dying, of course. That hadn’t been part of her plan.

Her dad picked up the towels again. Izzy had a feeling he was looking for things to do.

“I’ll take these upstairs. Are you sure you want to cook for Flora?”

That was her name?

“I want to cook.” She’d show this woman that they were a close family. That there was no room for anyone else.

There was no way she was going to college. She was going to stay home and get a job so that she could keep an eye on things. Maybe she could monetize her blog or something. Other people did it. People got paid for waving stupid handbags in front of the camera. Why couldn’t she be paid for saying important stuff? People commenting on her blog admitted to things they never said in public. They were talking about things that were real. If she could get her traffic up, that would help. And employers liked people with real life experience.

“Thanks, Izzy.” Her dad reached out one more time to hug her and Izzy moved away. She didn’t trust herself not to crumble.

She saw the pain cross his face and felt her breath catch.

Was she a horrible person?

“Sorry. I need to get on, that’s all. I have to check Molly’s school bag for tomorrow, read to her and then I have an essay to do.”

“I’ll try to persuade her to let me read to her so you can have a break. I know I’m second best, but I’ll give it a go.”

“It’s okay.” She liked to feel needed and Molly’s love was like a balm.

“I’m worried you’re working too hard.”

“I like doing it.” She liked the fact that she was keeping things as normal as possible, even though it was far from the life they’d had. She liked being useful. Needed. Indispensable.

“I appreciate what you’re doing, and I’m pleased you’re going to meet Flora. And I’m not trying to replace Becca. I’m trying to keep living, one day at a time, which is all any of us can do.” He sounded tired. “Fortunately love isn’t finite. You don’t use it all up on one person. It’s like a river that keeps flowing.”