“I wanted that, but she didn’t. It scared her, the sense of responsibility. She didn’t feel she was a good mother. She talked about you constantly, Clare would know how to do this, I wish I was more like Clare, you should have married someone like Clare.”

Tears stung her eyes. Never once had Becca said those things to her. “There is no one version of a good mother.”

“I told her that. But after she came back I think she was a little shocked herself that she’d left her child. No one even knew, but she couldn’t forget that she’d done it. She didn’t trust herself. And it was tough on me, too. I wondered if it was possible for her to settle with one man and a home, but she assured me she could. And for a while it worked. Then she started seeing a man she’d met through her work.” He turned away again, so that all she could see was dark hair and strong shoulders.

“And she was going to leave again.”

“I told her to leave. I didn’t want to draw it out, and have the kids suffer. I wasn’t going to chase after her again. No more trying to glue something that just couldn’t be stuck back together. We were going to tell the children together, but then she—well, it was all taken out of our hands and in the end I was telling the children their mother was dead. They didn’t need to know the rest. I decided it was better to leave them with the memories they had.”

Clare felt the sun on her face and a faint breath of wind lift her hair. He thought the conversation was over, but she knew the hardest part was yet to come.

She wished she didn’t have to say it, but she had no choice.

“Izzy knew, Jack.”

“What?” His voice was harsh. “What are you saying?”

“Not all the stuff you just told me. But she knew Becca was leaving you. She knew about the affair. She didn’t know you knew. It’s the reason she’s been feeling so insecure I think. Her mother was leaving you, and the only home she’d ever known. Izzy couldn’t figure out what that meant for her. She didn’t know what her future was. Was Becca going alone or taking her and Molly? Just Izzy? She was going crazy with it, and then Becca died and she couldn’t ask her.”

“She could have asked me. I’m her father.”