She likes it? What the hell?  Erin could feel her face turning red as she paced the sidewalk. “It’s…” Erin shook her head in frustration. “It’s not for you.”

“I realize that. I’m just saying, whoever brought this out in you must be pretty great. Much better than me.”

“What? No. This is about you and me. No one else.”

“Be honest, Erin. It wasn’t about just you and me for a very long time.”

What is she talking…  “Nolan.”

Bianca was silent, and for a moment Erin thought the call had dropped. “The thing is, I never actually wanted kids.”

What the hell? How could Erin have missed that? Wasn’t that a pretty important conversation to have with someone before, oh, I don’t know, starting a family? “Why didn’t you tell me that?”

“I’m sure you realize this, but I’m pretty awful at communicating. When we first met, I fell so hard and fast for you. And it only got stronger from there. I thought if I loved you enough, I could also love having a family with you, so I decided to keep it to myself that I didn’t actually want kids. Every step of the way, I kept telling myself I’d get there. Maybe I just needed to feel the baby kick. Maybe I just needed to hold him. But nothing worked. I felt so detached from him. I even resented him, because he took you away from me. And then I resented you, because it felt like you loved him more. When I left, I didn’t even miss him. I missed you, of course. How couldn’t I? You were such a big part of my life for so long. But if I’m being completely honest, I was too relieved to let it get to me too much. And I realize that makes me a terrible fucking person, but I can’t help it.”

Erin didn’t know whether to scream or cry. While she knew Bianca clearly didn’t feel attached to Nolan, hearing her say it out loud pissed her the fuck off. How could anyone meet that kid and not love him, especially his own flesh and blood who was there from the time he was made?

“Are you totally pissed now?” Bianca asked into the silence.

“I’m just trying to figure out how someone could meet my son and not realize how fucking amazing he is. Honestly, I feel bad for you. You’re the one who’s missing out.”

“Maybe I am, but I had to do what was right. I did a lot of selfish things, but leaving was the least of them. Nolan deserves two moms who love him as much as you do.”