With a gentle smile and a shake of the head he opened his arms to me and said: ‘So give yourself to Him, Veum. Don’t let your doubts fester any longer. With the Lord God you’ll find peace and calm for all your restless thoughts; with the Lord Jesus you’ll find light in the darkness. Veum, you’re a lamb that has strayed from the herd, but the shepherd is searching for you in the darkness, and you will find your way home again, I can assure you of that. You will find the way home because in your heart you’re one of us, you belong in our great … boundless flock.’

‘The great white flock, as in our traditional hymn?’ I held up my palms in defence. ‘That’s enough. Enough. Give me a break and let’s return to the real reason you’re here today.’

That stopped him in his tracks. His arms froze and sank slowly, his face lost the commitment and heat, and passion flowed out of him like melting snow from a car radiator.

‘Rebecca,’ he said flatly, sitting down heavily on the chair again. ‘I came here because of Rebecca…’

‘Exactly. And what you were going to explain to me was…’

‘Just a minute, Veum. I don’t know how well you know Rebecca.’

‘We grew up together. In the same street.’

‘Right. Then you’ll remember her father was a preacher.’

I nodded.

‘But as an adult Rebecca rebelled, broke with her childhood faith, which I’m fairly sure would’ve deeply wounded her father. I think her guilt regarding this rests heavily on her heart – and the fact that she was unable to make it up to him before he died.’

‘And how would she make it up to him? By changing course, against her own, genuine convictions?’301

‘At any rate she came to me … as her spiritual adviser. I think that I … became like a father to her. I took on the paternal role in this situation and was someone she felt she could confide in.’

‘And you exploited her vulnerability?’

‘No, Veum. That’s not how it was. You mustn’t believe that this was planned. That would be to pour opprobrium on me, my integrity and my principles.’

‘Beautiful words when you wear them for decoration.’

‘Spare me the cheap cynicism, Veum. What happened between Rebecca and me then just happened. You can’t understand what I suddenly felt for Rebecca.’

‘Oh no?’

‘No!’ he almost barked.

Meekly, I said: ‘Well, maybe not. But don’t forget I knew her before she got married.’

‘You … knew her … in the Biblical sense?’ His eyes swept past me, the way headlights sweep past you in the winter darkness.

‘No, Brevik,’ I said quietly. ‘Not in the Biblical sense, but…’ I shrugged. ‘Don’t let me put you off finishing what you have to say. I’ve never been in the habit of judging people. I’m not … yeah, well.’

He shook his head. ‘A priest can have feelings too, Veum. Even when they put him on a collision course with the Ten Commandments.’