‘How do you know what it’s like? You never went to boarding school.’

That was true, and it made Shepherd pause. All he knew about boarding schools came from what he’d read and seen on television; he had no first-hand experience at all. ‘I know it means being away from home for months at a time,’ he said. ‘It means being at school twenty-four hours a day.’

‘So?’

‘So I’d miss you not being here. You’re fourteen and soon you’ll be leaving home for good. I’d like to spend time while you’re still around.’

‘I’m thirteen, Dad. Fourteen is months away.’

‘But you’ll be going to university when you’re eighteen. That’s only four years.’

Liam sighed and folded his arms. Shepherd didn’t have to be an expert in reading body language to know that his son was upset about something.

‘What’s wrong, Liam?’

The boy sighed again. ‘OK, look, it’s not as if you’re here much, is it?’

‘I’ve been away a lot, I know. I’m sorry. I’ll try to be at home more if that’ll help.’

‘You always say that, Dad. You always say you’ll spend more time at home but you never do. And you’ve just been in Ireland for almost six months.’

‘I was back most weekends.’

Liam shook his head. ‘No, you weren’t. Maybe once a month you came back.’

Shepherd took his right hand off the steering wheel and ran it through his hair as he realised that his son was right. The Northern Ireland operation had been as dangerous as they came and every time he had left the Province he’d been putting himself at risk. ‘It was a tough job, Liam.’

‘They’re all tough jobs, Dad. And they all need you to be away.’

‘So what do you want? You want me to stop doing what I do and get a job in an office?’

Liam’s eyes narrowed. ‘Would you do that?’

Shepherd felt his stomach churn as he realised that he was having the same conversation he’d once had with his wife, a conversation that had resulted in him leaving the SAS.

‘It’s my career,’ he said.

‘It’s your life,’ said Liam, which was exactly what his mother had once said to Shepherd, and he smiled despite himself.

‘Sometimes I have to be away, there’s nothing I can do about that,’ said Shepherd. ‘I try to be here as often as I can and I phone every day when I’m away.’

Liam shook his head. ‘No you don’t,’ he said. ‘Sometimes you don’t phone for two or three days. You’re always sorry when you do eventually call and you always bring me a present when you come back, but . . .’ He tailed off and didn’t finish the sentence.

‘I’m sorry,’ said Shepherd.

‘You don’t have to keep apologising, Dad, I’m not a kid. I understand about your job and I know what it means to you. This isn’t about you. It’s about me.’

‘So how does boarding school help?’