‘Knot my stalks, this is a terrible thing to ask of a chap after a regimental dinner.’ Fivetide wondered if humans suffered so for their self-indulgence. He doubted it, no matter what they claimed; with the possibly honourable, possibly demented exception of Genar-Hofoen, they seemed a bit too stuffy and sensible willingly to submit to such self-punishment in the cause of fun. Besides, they were so insecure in their physical inheritance they had meddled with themselves in all sorts of ways; probably they thought hangovers were just annoying, rather than character-forming and so had, shortsightedly, dispensed with them.

‘I realise it’s early and it is the morning after the night before, Major. But please.’

The emissary - which Fivetide had met once before, and which possessed the irritating trait of looking somewhat like a better-built version of Fivetide’s dear departed father - had just appeared in the nest house without notice or warning. If he hadn’t known the way these things worked, Fivetide would right now be thinking of ways to torture the head of nest security. Tentacles had rolled, beaks had been separated, for less.

Lucky he’d been able to whip the bed covers round his deputy wife and both vice courtesans before the blighter had announced his/its presence by just floating into the nest.

Fivetide clapped his forebeak together a couple of times. Tastes like I’ve had me beak up me arse, he thought. ‘Can’t you just tell me what the damn signal means now?’ he asked.

‘You won’t know what I’m referring to. Come now; the sooner you read it the sooner I’ll be able to tell you what it means, and the sooner I’ll be able to demonstrate how it is just possible that this information will - at the very least - enable you to remove the harness of Culture interference forever.’

‘Hmm. I’m sure. And what’ll it do at most?’

The emissary of the ship let its eye stalks dip to either side, the Affronter equivalent of a smile. ‘At most, the information in this signal will lead to you being able to dominate the Culture as completely as it - if it chose to - could dominate you.’ The creature paused. ‘This signal could conceivably presage the start of a process which will deliver the entire Galaxy into your hands, and subsequently open up territories for expansion and exploitation beyond that which you cannot even begin to guess at. And I do not exaggerate. Have I your attention now, Major?’

Fivetide snorted sceptically. ‘I suppose you have,’ he said, shaking his limbs and rubbing his eyes. He returned his gaze to the note screen, and read the signal.

xGCU Fate Amenable To Change,
oGSV Ethics Gradient
& strictly as SC cleared:

Excession notice @c18519938.52314.
Constitutes formal All-ships Warning Level 0

[(in temporary sequestration) - textual note added by GSV
WisdomLikeSilence@n4.28.855.0150.650001].