Accommodating three people and three cats in my small place is a challenge—I don’t know how Mom and I did it. Of course, I didn’t have a room devoted to game-making or a living room full of cat towers back then. But, we make do.

Tilly is a curious bundle of adorable excitement. She raves about Grady’s place, the dogs, the cats, my truck, and even my place. She happily takes on chores like watering the plants, feeding the cats, and helping with dishes like she’s desperate for a normal home life.

I remember how that felt. I also remember how lonely a nomadic life was—I don’t want that for Mom or Tilly if I can help it. They stayed at their last place for three years—a new record for Mom. So, maybe there’s hope that they’ll find a permanent home here, especially with a support system.

Soon, when tapped out on self-assigned chores, Tilly crashes. I give her and Mom my bed—it makes more sense. And when the house is quiet and my guests completely taken care of, I let Mom know that I’m heading to Grady’s for “a game of chess.”

“Is that what you kids are calling it these days?” She laughs before kissing my cheek. “See you in the morning.”

The night air whips through my hair on the short drive to Grady’s, making me cold, but I like it. I want Grady to warm me. The last twelve hours have been an emotional flood, overrunning me with love and excitement, but also fears and misgivings—I am mentally spent. Through it all, I’ve latched on to how I want to feel, as Grady said, and trusted my feelings to lead me as they should go. And the overwhelming feeling now is how desperate I am to get back to him.

Every part of me aches for him.

I’ve got no complaints about my previous sex life. I’ve had very capable, enjoyable partners. But I didn’t realize what was missing, how much more sex could be with someone like Grady Tripp.

A strong connection magnifies everything. Touches feel electric. Kisses feel intoxicating. Everything is more intense, deeper, and breathtaking.

I knew sex. I didn’t know sex like this. And that’s not simply because I’ve moved from an emotional baby pool to the vast and tumultuous deep end. It’s because of him.

Grady makes loving me an art, an act of worship, his magnum opus. I have never been loved like this. I feel it pulsing through his veins and charging my core. His intensity invigorates me. Frees me. He makes me more myself than I’ve ever been.

That’s what I need tonight—to be myself with him.