But you know how it is with these new receptionists. Rosita, as sweet as she is, just tries too hard. She wears these ridiculous woollen sweaters all the time with underwear that is … umm … how do I put it delicately? … pointy. Very, very pointy.

Which is why I email things instead of just walking over and telling her. How can I have a proper conversation with a woman dressed like that?

And then there is that eagerness to please. Unbearable.

Last week I overheard Jerry tell one of the principals in the office that he was damn hungry and that he wished someone would get him a sandwich from the Subway down the road. I’d been thinking of going out for a walk and decided that I could probably pick up a sandwich too and surprise Jerry. As a little gift. Not ass-licking or anything. So I quietly got up and left without telling Yetch or Rajni—so as not to spoil the surprise—and went all the way to Subway. I got Jerry an Italian BMT and a Tuna for myself. But, imagine this, when I come back Jerry is already sitting in his chair with a sandwich and Rosita infront of him. Rosita was beaming from ear to ear, breasts pointed at Jerry like woollen torpedoes. Apparently, she had overheard him too and had the sandwich delivered. I had to go back to my workstation and eat both sandwiches so that no one would realize the truth.

Really, there is no limit to the woman’s eagerness to please.

Which is how she completely fucked up my taxi booking.

Rosita decided that while I could go in a Tata Indigo, Santanam should travel in nothing less than a Hyundai Sonata. I assume the idiot woman thought that this way she could impress a principal—a potential partner no less—and maybe get a little extra bonus in March.

Bitch.

Of course I had no inkling of what had transpired. When I went downstairs and saw the Sonata I was actually quite pleased. I figured that the travel agents had run out of Indigos and sent us a replacement.

Everyone loves it when this happens.

So I travelled all the way to the hotel in style and reached there just as Santanam, Yetch, Tony and Rajni climbed out of a Tata Indigo looking very upset and uncomfortable. Waiting for us at the portico of the hotel was the team from Panchatantra.

Then, horror of horrors, all the Tantra guys rush towards me to welcome me and say hello. I’d never seen any of these guys before, but they all enthusiastically shook my hand and told me how highly the Chairman spoke of the team from Dufresne. They said that the Chairman had asked them to cooperate with us fully to make the university project a big success. One of them motioned at Santanam, Yetch, Rajni and Tony to follow us inside.

It was only after they’d seated me at the head of the conference table and ordered coffee and biscuits for me that I could clarify. That Santanam, and not me, was the head of the Dufresne team. Only after some convincing did they let us switch seats and allow Santanam to lead the meeting.