I couldn’t help but feel a pang of jealousy that this was all before my time. The Doctor’d been a great friend and mentor to Madam, that was clear, and I’d known he might show up again. I just wasn’t sure quite how I felt about it.

Anyways, the three of us met up again first thing next morning. I didn’t know where the Doctor was staying – Madam said something about a sort of travelling box he had which made me think of him living in a gypsy caravan – but we was all refreshed and ready for action when we sat down to a cuppa in a little Italian café off the Old Kent Road run by an old mate of mine, Sally Forth. Well, when I say mate, I mean we sort of knocked around together at school on account of both of us not having many friends. The other pupils seemed to know I was a bit different and they was quite cruel. And Sally was one of them kids that always ponged a bit (well, ponged even more than the rest of us) and was a bit away with the fairies so they was pretty merciless to her too. So we ended up becoming fast friends, as misfits of all complexions often do.

The Mistress, the Doctor and me had a table right by the window but there was two big, bosomy ladies with feathery hats right by us so we kept our chat on the down low.

‘Someone tried to kill me last night,’ said the Doctor.

‘Occupational hazard, surely?’ said Madam.

‘That’s true.’ The Doctor smiled and nodded at me. ‘Glad to see you’re settling in, Vastra. It’s always a good idea to make friends with the locals.’

‘So you was pushed from the flys?’ I whispered, trying to be discreet-like.

‘Yes. Long story. Well, longish. I came to the Pomegranate Halls looking for a man named Bob Blood. Not a nice man. Not nice at all. And with very bad taste in suits.’

Me and the Mistress looked at each other. ‘Checked suits?’ she said.

‘Yes. Why?’

‘We discovered a headless corpse round the back of the Pom!’ I breathed. ‘In a very loud suit!’

‘Could be him,’ mused the Doctor. ‘Though he doesn’t have a monopoly on sloppy tailoring.’

‘Why were you looking for him?’ asked Madam.

‘Well, you see I was at a loose end. Sort of. In the TARDIS. Started reading old back issues of the Illustrated London News, you know, just for fun. In the bath. Though that can be quite tricky. And I hate that feeling you get when your fingers go all wrinkly—’

‘Doctor.’